


A Catalyst for Change

by RealismNotSexism



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alcoholic Kylo Ren, Angst and Romance, BDSM, Consensual, Consensual Sex, Drama & Romance, F/M, Female Masturbation, Female Solo, Fluff and Angst, Forbidden Love, Force Bond (Star Wars), Lemons, Light BDSM, Male Masturbation, Male Solo, OC, Original Character Eyal'Bibe, Original Character(s), Politics, Romance, Semi-Public Sex, Simultaneous Orgasm, Slow Burn, Smut, Star Wars - Freeform, Written by a woman
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-30
Updated: 2020-10-11
Packaged: 2020-11-08 09:48:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 33,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20833445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RealismNotSexism/pseuds/RealismNotSexism
Summary: Rey is captured by Kylo and imprisoned on his ship, and the Rebels are helpless to rescue her. After suffering from torment at the hands of Hux, Kylo imprisons her to his private quarters for protection. It is only a matter of time before their impassioned hatred turns to impassioned attraction. But what hope do they have to reconcile their feelings when one is destined for destruction and the other restoration?Three more chapters and it's done! I'm very close to being done and am waiting until I have all parts finished before uploading. Find me on Twitter @feministfanfic for updates!Mostly plot with some porn. So far, there is smut in chapters 2, 11, 12, and 19, though there is other lighter stuff to build sexual tension in between. Putting this out there for the people who don't care about plot.A disclaimer: I didn't create any of the characters, universe, etc. unless otherwise stated.





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Rey in captivity, Kylo begins to confront his feelings for her.

Kylo Ren smiled to himself as he walked down the long corridor, his footsteps echoing loudly on the metal floors. _Finally_, he thought. _She’s here._ He’d waited for this day since their first chance encounter. His embarrassing defeat earned him a gruesome scar and severe punishment from Snoke. Their encounters through the force did little to ease the resentment that continued to grow with each passing day of her freedom. And though he was no less angry, he always left feeling unsettled. They made him question the nature of the force, question the potential of his own abilities. But he found most disturbing his physical reaction to them. On each occasion, the sight of her caused his heart to skip and a gentle warmth to spread in his chest. With careful concentration, he was able to hide these feelings from her, but that only made him more aware of their troubling nature. But now that she was here, he could put an end to that. Put an end to _her_. She would either join him and destroy her old self as he once had, or he would kill her.

He approached the room and saw his face reflected in the shiny metal doors. He wore a scowl as he often did when thinking about her, twisting his scar into a more grotesque shape. He attempted to smooth his expression. _If I’m to persuade her to join me, I must maintain control. _He could sense her on the other side of the closed doors, and to his surprise she was completely centered. He could sense nothing but peace from her. _She must be meditating, _he mused, and he dared not probe beyond her force-empowered calm since she previously showed a tremendous ability to resist him. Despite the force-inhibiting restraints and collar, small amounts of the force could be drawn upon by strong wielders, a fact that he knew marked the growth of her abilities. Anger bubbled in his chest at this observation. He was intimidated by her own largely untrained powers, and he found it difficult to separate himself from his jealousy. He clenched his fists and breathed deeply. “Open the doors,” he said to the guards with a deep voice. The doors slid open with a hiss and he stepped into the small interrogation room.

“Rey.”

For a moment, he sensed her blood pressure increase before she could regain control. He hoped she didn’t sense the sudden skip of his heart. “Ben,” she spat.

He grimaced at the sound of his old name but brushed off the attack. He needed to maintain focus. “I hear you came to see me voluntarily. Were our conversations not enough for you?”

She laughed and rolled her eyes. “Ben, I came to see you because I believe there’s still good in you. I’ve _seen_ the good in you. It’s not too late to stop this pointless war against the rebellion. It’s not too late to reverse the damage the First Order has caused.” She rushed the words out, afraid that she would only get the chance to say it once.

Kylo walked further into the room and paced slowly back and forth in front of her. She was well restrained, multiple metal bars holding her legs and arms in place. Her head was situated between two small walls, limiting its movement. He preferred her this way. She was unable to run and unable to look away. Her naivety could prevent her no further from facing him head on. From confronting the lasting scar she left on his face and the disturbing truth that he had murdered Han. He cared little for the opinions of others, but he strongly wanted her to see him beyond the mask. Even if it meant she rejected him forever, his soul craved the unrestrained vulnerability he felt was possible when he was with her.

“I believe that you believe that was your mission,” his deep voice sounded. “You have clouded your mind with the naivety of the Jedi, allowed their teachings to repress your innermost desires.”

“What are you going on about? Does everything have to be a slight against the Jedi Order?” she scoffed.

“Hmmm.” To Rey’s surprise, he did appear to consider her question, though she meant it only has an insult. “Both of our paths have been marred by their teachings, yet our decisions are our own. So no, not everything.” He paused. “But it is part of the bond that connects us, so yes.”

“That’s very profound of you,” she remarked sarcastically, “but I don’t understand what it has to do with why I’m here. You’re just afraid to face me.” She stared directly into his eyes as she said this.

Kylo returned her gaze without looking away. He felt that familiar surge of warmth in his chest and she broke eye contact. He grinned, “Rey...” and moved closer to her. “Have you considered that there are parts of yourself that are unknown to you?” He paused for effect and he could see her grapple with that thought. “The Jedi teach you to ignore your feelings, to pretend that they don’t exist. And yet, they never go away.” She began to offer protest when he interrupted. “I would know. I began my journey with their teachings. Tell me, what do you think happens to these emotions when you will them away?”

She looked unsure as she tried to respond. “Well, um. Obviously, it’s like you said. They, they go away.”

“Do you really believe that?” he asked moving closer.

Rey squirmed in her restraints, suddenly uncomfortable with the direction of the conversation, and Kylo felt her careful walls quiver. “I don’t know, I mean, what else would happen, Ben? You tell me if you’re such the expert.”

“Is that anger I detect? Take a moment and center yourself. Will yourself back to a neutral state.” He waited until he sensed her aura settle. “Now close your eyes and go deep within yourself. Go deep and observe your feelings.”

Rey snorted. “I’m not doing that, Ben. I don’t know what game you’re playing, but I’m having no part of it.”

He was within arm’s reach of her now and he reached a hand out and held it just above her shoulder. As expected, her aura faltered again. “Do you see, Rey? How easy it was to trigger your anger again? It isn’t gone, it’s simply dormant. It’s these unobserved emotions that are truly the most dangerous. And one of your most fearful emotions is desire. But what is it that you desire? A family, sure. To fix whatever part of you caused your family to abandon you. And you sense that you can find a family here. That you can find the tools to fix yourself through training here.”

Her eyes grew wide and tears began to well up. “How dare you speak to me of my family. You killed your own father, what do you know of family?” She sniffled, frustrated that she couldn’t wipe her nose.

“Again, the emotions don’t go away. The Jedi allow them to linger in the shadows, to fester and gnaw at your soul until you snap, and you lose sight of who you were.”

Rey sniffled again. “I thought you turned to the dark side because you wanted more power.”

Kylo saw genuine curiosity on her face. “Yes, that’s certainly part of it. But it would be foolish to pretend that there weren’t influences outside of my control. The teachings of the Jedi turned me into what I am today. It’s because of them that my thirst for power grew so strong.”

“Then what about me? If the Jedi are so bad, why am I okay? Ben, you have it all wrong. Snoke has invaded your mind, twisted your thoughts. If you would only just – “

“Silence.” He was infuriated by the unadulterated compassion in her voice. He had wasted enough time humoring her. “I’m making you an offer, Rey. One that no one else in the galaxy has been awarded. Join me,” he said as he clenched his hand. “Study under me and learn the ways of the dark side. We have a powerful connection. Imagine what we could accomplish together.” He held her gaze, his deep chestnut eyes entrancing her.

“N-no,” she said shakily as he drew nearer.

He moved his face mere inches from hers, and she winced, turning her face as much as the restraints allowed. He felt deep stirrings being so near to her, and his cock began to harden. He imagined the heat of her body pressed against his and yearned for a physical connection. “The last time we touched it was half removed, but you were willing enough. Why are you so hesitant now?” He gazed at her lips as he lifted his gloved hand to hover next to her cheek and she barely managed to make a sound of protest in all her terror.

He paused, surprisingly disturbed by her resistance and slowly retreated. Rey let out an audible sigh, her breathing ragged. He turned away sharply without a word and left the room. _What the hell is happening? _he thought. Since his turn to the dark side, he had shown little regard for the emotional state of those under his control. _Rey... What makes you so special?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Right now it is important to support the global Black Lives Matter movement. Read a book on white privilege, have difficult conversations with your friends, amplify black voices on social media, protest, donate money, donate supplies to protestors! Message me for some more resources on how you can help <3


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo is in deep denial of his feelings for Rey, despite his sexual attraction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut alert: male masturbation

As the doors hissed closed behind him, he exhaled a sigh of relief, and the storm troopers on either side stood at attention. He felt a wave of nausea and brushed past them without a glance clutching his stomach. _What the hell?_ He hoped no one noticed the sheen of sweat on his face as he rushed for his chambers. _Just hold it together for another minute_, he thought desperately as he all but ran through the corridors. He had almost reached his chamber doors when someone called his name.

“Supreme Leader, a moment if you will.”

“Can’t you see I’m in a hurry, Hux?” he said, turning to look at the red-haired man. He sneered at his smile.

“Sir, I am tasked with overseeing the Jedi’s security force. I need to know what you found out.”

Though his request was genuine, Kylo sensed Hux’s pleasure in catching him off guard. “What we discussed doesn’t pertain to security detailing. Which means that your being here means you’re not doing your job. See to it that I’m not bothered with your incompetence in the future.”

Hux sputtered a “Yes sir,” before abruptly heading for an elevator on the far side of the hall.

Kylo heard him muttering under his breath but let it go. He needed to get some air before anyone else saw him so close to losing it.

When he stepped into his chambers, he picked up the nearest item and threw it against the wall. It was small figure made of metal, so it only made a small dent in the wall before it bounced limply to the floor. “God dammit!” he yelled. He fell onto the grey couch with a frustrated groan. “Why do I feel this way when I see her?” he said to no one. “I need to keep it together.” He sat up and glanced at a clock embedded in the wall. He was only in there for a few minutes and even that was too much for him. He had no idea how he was going to break her if she appeared to have all the power, even if she didn’t know it. He was perplexed; she was restrained in almost every way possible, yet there was still some way that she was able to break through his defenses.

His cock throbbed at the thought of her restrained in the interrogation room and he closed his eyes to savor the feeling. It had been a long time since he had fucked somebody. He told himself it was because his duty to the Order was too demanding, but deep down he knew that he dreaded the intimacy. Even with hired sex workers, women trained to remain emotionally guarded, he was afraid of experiencing the momentary bond. He assumed that his sexual frustration was the source of his weakness for Rey. It was simple biology, him a male, and her an attractive female.

Almost subconsciously, his hand moved towards his growing erection, and he rubbed himself through his pants. Immediately, he felt the familiar, welcome distance between himself and his problems. He opened his eyes and removed the gloves from his hands, then unzipped his pants. He pulled out his cock and eyed it, watching it grow harder with his touch. The skin pulled back to reveal a thick, purple head at the top. He wrapped his hand around it and began to stroke it lightly, using the extra skin to ease the friction since his lube was in the bedroom. He hardened to a full seven inches as he continued to stroke faster, twisting his hand around as he did. He closed his eyes and envisioned several women he had slept with or seen in porn, trying different techniques to bring him closer to the edge. But as he drew closer to climax, images of Rey, naked and lewd crossed into his mind. He grunted, trying to push them from view, but they returned even stronger each time. His mouth fell open as he imagined her riding his cock, moaning and rubbing her tits, riding him until he was about to burst. A line of sweat formed above his brow and he stroked faster. “I’m gonna cum,” he said out loud, his eyes still closed.

In his vision, Rey leaned forward and whispered in his ear, “Cum inside me, Kylo. I want you to fill me up,” and her pace quickened.

His free hand reached down and grabbed his balls. He gently moved them in his hand as he grew closer and closer to climax. He could almost feel the heat of her breath on his skin, the warmth of her pussy. “Rey!” he screamed as he shot cum shot in thick streams. He was panting and he continued stroking for several moments after he finished. “Fuck,” he breathed. He hadn’t had an orgasm like that in ages, though he began to feel shame when he blinked open his eyes and returned to reality.

He swept a hand through his hair and set to cleaning his cum from the floor. _What is _wrong_ with me? _He wiped at the floor furiously, angry that he let himself lose control over Rey again. When the floor was clean, he moved to the bathroom to throw the towel in a hamper and washed his hands. He looked at himself in the mirror in disgust. _No one else has to know. I’ll fix it myself. Besides, maybe now I’ll be better able to control myself when I see her again._ He turned the water off and watched the water spiral down the drain. The elated feeling from masturbating gave way as it always did to a deep depression, a familiar ache that he felt in his chest.

He left his chambers and carried on his duties as if nothing had changed. And really, not much had. He was still somber, angry, and unpleasant to all those around him, though he couldn’t deny the slight surge in his chest when he thought of her. Once or twice, he even felt his lips twinge up slightly when he thought about seeing her again. As he settled into bed that night, his mind raced with thoughts of what tomorrow would bring. The longer she stayed on the ship, the more pressure he was under to convert her or kill her.

He tossed and turned, unable to quiet his mind with _her _so close to him. He growled his frustration and sat up in bed. He brought a bottle of liquor to his lips and took a few swift drinks to help steady his nerves. “I can either stay up here going crazy all night,” he muttered, pausing to take another drink, “or I can go talk to her.” He set the bottle down and wiped his arm across his lips. “That’s _crazy_!” _I can’t go see her. _He got out of bed and paced the floor, unable to keep still. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.” He ran a nervous hand through his hair and grabbed for the bottle again, taking another drink. “Fuck.” He set the bottle down with a resounding thud. “I have to see her tonight.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Right now it is important to support the global Black Lives Matter movement. Read a book on white privilege, have difficult conversations with your friends, amplify black voices on social media, protest, donate money, donate supplies to protestors! Message me for some more resources on how you can help <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey brokers a deal with Kylo to gain his trust.

He dressed quickly and walked silently down the corridors to Rey. He took less populated paths where possible to avoid any invasive questions from Hux. He approached the room where the new shift of storm troopers saluted him. _I’ll have to mind wipe them when I leave_, he noted and walked inside.

Rey was asleep, her head resting on the walls that constrained it. She looked so peaceful. He entered slowly, unsure of what to do. _Why did I even come here?_ he wondered, though he felt a sense of peace being in her presence. He paused as he reached her sleeping form. He longed to reach out and touch her face with an ungloved hand, to match the physical connection with the one they already shared through the Force, but he decided against it. He knew doing so would violate the last tendrils of trust that brought her to him.

He couldn’t bring himself to leave, however. The ache in his chest was lighter in her presence and he didn’t want to give that up just yet. He would meditate for a while and then leave before she knew he was here. But right as he motioned to turn around, Rey blinked her eyes open.

“W-what?” she stammered as she regained consciousness. “Ben, what the fuck are you doing? Have you been drinking?”

He backed away a few paces hoping that some space between them would lessen the awkward tension. “I’m sorry,” he offered lamely, averting his gaze. “It’s just...” He paused, not knowing what to say. How could he articulate the conflicted emotions whirling inside him? _She would never understand._

For the first time in their history, Rey saw a softness in his expression. She watched carefully as he stared into space, overtaken with the urge to comfort him. She recognized the hurt that was so much like her own. She wondered what it was than pained him so deeply. She was sure it was more than his mistaken belief that Luke was going to murder him. He had shown a propensity for the dark side long before that. _What happened to you, Ben? _The silence between them lengthened and he dropped to the floor sitting cross-legged. She didn’t know what to think. She wanted to say something, but she didn’t want to risk angering him, so she stared at him slack-jawed.

“You think me a fool,” he said. It was a statement, not a question.

“No,” she responded. “I think you’re...”

He lifted his gaze to her. “Yes?”

She saw bitterness return to his eyes. “Oh, never mind,” she said frustrated. His eyes narrowed and she prepared herself for another of his tantrums, but it never came. “If you’re just going to sit there, would you mind loosening these restraints a little?”

“So, you do think me a fool,” he said with a teasing expression.

“You’re impossible! I can barely feel my hands anymore since I’ve been strapped to this board all day. I haven’t eaten or had any water and I’ve had an itch on my back for an hour that’s driving me mad. Is this part of your technique to break me or something?” she asked exasperated.

Kylo sat there for a moment before responding. It wasn’t a part of his plan. If he had to guess, he would say Hux was almost certaintly behind it. And as much as he hated to admit it, it was an effective tactic. Still, it seemed cruel to make her suffer so drastically. He didn’t understand his feelings, but a part of him was pained to play a role in her unnecessary punishment. He couldn’t bring himself to trust her entirely, however. He had too much riding on this to let her escape. He shook his head, “Even if I wanted to help you, I can’t trust you.”

Rey rolled her eyes. “What if I showed you?”

“How do you plan to do that?”

“I can let you in.” She saw his eyes widen in surprise. “I can let you in _enough_ to know that I have no plan of escape, but that’s as far as you can go,” she clarified.

He couldn’t deny his desire to get a glimpse into her mind that formed when she resisted his efforts that first time so long ago. “Okay,” he agreed. He stood and walked closer to her. “Open your mind to me and I promise I won’t probe beyond your intentions.” He could tell she was wary of him.

“You know it goes both ways, right? The further you probe into my mind, the further I can look into yours.”

He grinned. He knew this wasn’t entirely true. “That’s only if I’m unable to resist you, and I don’t think I’m in any danger of being overpowered given your current state. But don’t worry. I have no intention of breaking our deal.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Right now it is important to support the global Black Lives Matter movement. Read a book on white privilege, have difficult conversations with your friends, amplify black voices on social media, protest, donate money, donate supplies to protestors! Message me for some more resources on how you can help <3


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> During a brief but intense force bond, Rey sees something in Kylo she didn't know existed.

They stared at each other intensely, neither one making a move. Their boundaryless contact in the past was largely unpredictable and usually occurred through the will of one individual rather than through the mutual agreement of both. This was something entirely new.

“Well... Get on with it then,” Rey voiced in hushed tones. Her breathing was shallow as she considered what she had agreed to. Though she was confident she could fend off his attempts to probe further than their agreement allowed, he might see a flash of confidential information before she had time to react. It was a dangerous game she was playing, but she had to do it in order to survive. She was no good to the Rebellion dead. And besides, how else could she prove to the Rebellion, yet alone Ben, that he was capable of change.

Kylo called a table over to him with the force and sat on the edge facing Rey.

She sensed his heartbeat increasing and cringed. “I didn’t imagine you’d be so excited to live out your sick fantasy of accessing my mind,” she said dryly, trying to play it cool.

His lips turned up in a half-smile. He was grateful she mistook his excitement for malevolence and not affection. She was finally beginning to trust him. This was the next step on the road of their union together as master and apprentice, and he couldn’t ruin it by allowing his emotions to get in the way.

“Are you ready?” he asked. Rey nodded. He let his legs hang on the edge of the table as he stared into her eyes. In the past, they had never allowed the bond to form when they were in such close proximity to one another and the effect was breath-taking. As soon as Rey lowered her mental defenses, her thoughts flooded into his like waters breaking through a dam. He gripped the edge of the table to steady himself against the unexpected onslaught. His heart yearned for him to go deeper, to tether himself to her completely so he would never feel alone again.

“Ben...” Rey whispered with her eyes closed. A sudden surge of panic took over as her soul was laid vulnerable in front of the man responsible for the most recent trauma in her life. She sensed his hunger and braced for the attack against the deeper levels of her consciousness.

He sensed her panic and swallowed his desire for her, though not before she caught a quick glimpse into his mind. It was an echo of a feeling she had long assumed was dead for the man. It felt like love. Abruptly, he withdrew completely, leaving them both gasping for air.

He eyed her suspiciously. “You broke the deal,” he sneered, panting.

“No, I swear I didn’t try to do that.”

“And you expect me to believe you?”

“Have I ever lied to you?” she said firmly.

He took a deep breath in to point out the many times she had, indeed, lied to him but came up short. He had never realized how earnest she had been in all their dealings. “No,” he finally admitted with a huff.

Rey smiled and said, “So how about it?” wiggling her fingers.

He slid off the table and walked over to her. He stood inches away from her face and searched her eyes. “You surprise me, Rey,” he said and loosened her cuffs. “Better?” he asked with a tight smile.

Incredulous, Rey nodded emphatically. Admittedly, a large part of her didn’t believe he would actually hold up his end of the bargain. She cleared her throat. “Thank you.”

“I’ll send a droid to bring you food and water. But this stays between us,” he added with a stern look, gesturing to her hands.

Rey had seen that look in him before and she intended to heed his instruction.

He stood there for a moment, unsure of what to do next. Her lips were parted slightly, her chin tilted up toward him in what appeared to be an invitation to kiss her. But he knew better than to believe she could ever want anything from him except surrender. He was only seeing what his sick mind wanted him to see. He retreated slowly, moving awkwardly for the doors. His heart pounded heavily in response to his decision to acquiesce. If anyone noticed, he would say it was his way of manipulating her into joining him, but he knew it was something more. Something unnamed deep inside him compelled him to do it. And though he had the power to ignore it, he chose to do it anyway.

“Wait,” Rey called after him just before he reached the door. He paused and turned his face to her.

“Hmm?” He found it difficult to speak.

“I, just, um...” she hesitated. “I really mean it. Thank you, Ben.” Her voice was gentle.

He wanted to accept her gratitude; he recognized how incredible his act of kindness really was. But yet again, his fear of vulnerability led him to cruelty, and he felt a cold hand close around his warming heart. “Don’t make me regret it,” he said sharply, and left the room, but not before he heard Rey sigh heavily into the silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Right now it is important to support the global Black Lives Matter movement. Read a book on white privilege, have difficult conversations with your friends, amplify black voices on social media, protest, donate money, donate supplies to protestors! Message me for some more resources on how you can help <3


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo loses his temper, giving Hux the upper-hand.

“She would have broken by now! This is ridiculous. It’s an embarrassment to the Order!”

“We can’t let her starve, Hux. I can’t train a dead apprentice.”

“But three meals, sir? This is peculiar treatment of a prisoner. Surely the other officers in this room can attest to the effectiveness of food restriction in manipulating a captive,” Hux offered practically.

Kylo had made little progress over the last month and a half, which Hux blamed on Rey being fed consistently. He never outright said he thought Kylo had a soft spot for Rey, but he intimated it whenever possible around high-ranking officers.

Kylo saw heads nodding around the room. Though he was Supreme Leader, his claim to the position was razor thin. While he would prefer to shout and make a show of his force prowess, he had to tread lightly until his power was uncontested throughout the Order, something Hux was making especially challenging. “Your hubris continues to grow day-by-day, though your actions don’t seem to keep the pace.” He heard the officers chuckle at his remark. Hux opened his mouth to speak, but Kylo raised a hand to silence him. “Have you ever interrogated a force-sensitive, Hux?”

Frowning, Hux shook his head no.

“How about one trained by one of the greatest Jedi of this age?”

Hux’s cheeks reddened and he seemed to shrink back into himself like a turtle into its shell.

“Who is familiar with force-sensitive interrogation techniques?” he asked the group. A few of the senior officers raised their hands. They were aged well beyond active duty but remained due to their priceless knowledge of force-sensitives from when the Empire still offered such specialization tracks. “Are traditional interrogation tactics useful?” This elicited head shakes from them all. “You see, Hux,” Kylo said, returning his gaze to the red-haired man, “a Force-sensitive can go without food and water much longer than the average humanoid. It will take subtlety to break this one, not crude parlor tricks.”

After this encounter, Hux refrained from openly challenging Kylo, though Kylo suspected it was only a temporary victory. And it made his lack of progress no less frustrating. Each day was the same. He would enter the room, carefully guarding his feelings, and ask her his questions. Equally guarded, she would refuse them all. She was incredibly disciplined, and he was beginning to think she would never break, that he would have to kill her. The thought scared him. Time was running out and people would begin to question his motives for keeping her alive.

To cope with the stress of the interrogation on top of his other duties, he began to drink earlier in the day. Gradually, he spoke to Rey less and less. It had been over a month since he'd last seen her. He heard a knock at his chamber doors as he lay in a drunken stupor on the floor.

“Supreme Leader, Ren?” a voice spoke with trepidation.

Kylo was prone to particularly aggressive outbursts when dealing with low-ranking members of the military. Where he had to restrain his outbursts in front of his Counsel, he was free to abuse the grunts as he pleased. He peeled himself from the floor and stumbled to the door, using the force to open the lock with a flick of his wrist.

The woman saluted stiffly and tried not to stare at the scar lining his eye. Since Rey’s capture, he was rarely seen without his helmet outside of the interrogation room. “S-Supreme Leader, sir.”

“Out with it,” Kylo voiced gruffly.

“Your presence is requested on the main deck, sir. It’s the Jedi prisoner, sir. She’s refusing to speak with anyone but you. They wanted me to check-” Her voice was cut off and she brought her hands to her throat.

“What do you mean ‘anyone but me,’” he snarled.

“It’s just... Sir...” she stammered, trying to speak through the tightness of her throat.

Kylo released his hand and grabbed her by her shoulders, pulling her face close. “Tell. Me.”

“You weren’t there today. So. Hux thought-”

Kylo used a force push and the storm trooper slammed into the wall, her head handing limply to the side. “Fucking Hux,” he growled, grabbing his helmet.

He entered the interrogation room in a flurry. “Hux!” he yelled, using the force to turn the man towards him before he had a chance to react.

Rey let out an exclamation of surprise at his sudden approach.

“Supreme Leader! What perfect timing. I was just-”

“Don’t _fuck_ with me, Hux,” he said slurring, moving his hand for his lightsaber.

“My lord, I understand your confusion, but please! There’s no need to be dramatic,” he said with a scornful expression.

Kylo let out a yell and ignited the blade.

Hux raised his hands and began to back away slowly, attempting to move towards the door.

“What were you doing in here, Hux? What did you do to her?” he added frantically, casting a glance towards her, though no one could tell through his mask.

“You failed to show up for interrogation duty today and someone needed to step in. Besides, the Counsel grows impatient. We thought it best that someone without such a,” he paused searching for the most incriminating word, “connection to the prisoner try to get some answers. And it’s certainly proved fruitful.”

Kylo glanced towards Rey again, this time noticing the line of sweat on her forehead and the black IT-O droid floating behind her. “I swear to god if you hurt her...”

“Oh, I did. She didn’t prove as difficult to break as you had me believe,” he taunted, edging closer to the door.

Kylo gritted his teeth, his head pounding with his hatred for the red-haired devil. He found it difficult to control his temper given how drunk he was, and he stumbled toward Hux, his saber burning a long, black mark along the floor.

“Did you know that she still has access to her force powers?” Hux asked, stopping Kylo in his tracks. “I didn’t think so. I realized upon a close inspection of her restraints that her hands were quite lose. After some encouragement from the IT-O, she revealed she was able to loosen them herself over time. Naturally, I had to use physical force to punish her for the infraction.” Hux was directly in front of the door now and he held his hand poised to reach for the control panel.

With a final look at Rey, Kylo noticed the red welts on her face growing in size and the spots of blood under her nose. His vision went red and lunged for Hux, but not before he managed to press the controls and open the door. They fell into the hallway and Hux scrambled to get away. Kylo grabbed the edge of his coat with his hand and dragged him beneath him. His lightsaber lay on the floor next to him, but Kylo didn’t reach for it. Instead, he landed a fist on his jaw with a dulled thud. This was personal. Thud. Hux hurt Rey. Thud. And it was Kylo’s fault. Thud. He’s the one that loosened the cuffs. Thud. Hux deserved to die- thud – but not quickly – thud.

Hux sputtered blood onto Kylo’s black-clad form and struggled to escape, but it was no use. By now, a crowd had gathered to watch the violent display, but no one dared to intervene. And from the room beyond, Rey watched in horror.

“Ben!” she screamed, incapable of doing anything else. “Ben!” She closed her eyes and desperately reached out through the force. _Please open up, Ben. Please let me in._ She inhaled sharply as she felt his walls crumble and her mind enveloped by the intense sea of emotions whirling inside him. _Ben... Stop!_ she willed through her mind.

_But he hurt you_, she heard him sob. _I can’t let him hurt you._

_I don’t want you to do this. Please... for me..._

A tear escaped his eye as he stood up. He removed his helmet and spat on Hux’s bloodied face, but Hux just smiled. He muttered something quietly so Kylo had to kneel down to hear it.

“The Counsel now knows why you haven’t made any progress,” he breathed into Kylo’s ear. “They’ll have your head for this,” he laughed, spitting blood onto Kylo’s face.

Kylo pulled away. He felt his rage tearing at his throat and barely managed to resist the urge to drive his saber into Hux’s heart.

_It’s okay, Ben. Let him go_, Rey whispered through their connection.

Kylo felt a wave of numbness overtake him and he motioned to the nearest storm trooper. “You. Call a medical droid to take care of this. And make sure I am not disturbed.” He didn’t bother waiting for a response and closed himself in the room with Rey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Right now it is important to support the global Black Lives Matter movement. Read a book on white privilege, have difficult conversations with your friends, amplify black voices on social media, protest, donate money, donate supplies to protestors! Message me for some more resources on how you can help <3


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo and Rey move closer to recognizing their feelings for one another and new political developments arise after Kylo's outburst from the previous night.

The doors closed behind him as he made his way messily into the room. He eyes were wide like that of a wild horse and he didn’t know where to focus his gaze. He attempted to reach out with the force to subtly detect her current state, but in his inebriation, he miscalculated and alerted her of his attempt. “Shit!”

“Ben?” She looked frightened.

“Why’re you so scared of me Rey?” he asked, walking right up to where she lay restrained.

“Are you serious? Ben, are you drunk?” Her nose wrinkled at the acrid stench of liquor on his breath.

He registered the look of disgust on her face and laughed. “Yes, Rey, I’m drunk. Is that why you’re looking at me like that?” he teased, resting his elbow on the contraption.

She pulled away instinctively. “No Ben, it’s because you’re fucking psychotic. What the hell are you doing in here like this?”

“You’ve certainly gotten mouthy,” he chided, gripping her chin with his hand. Without wearing his gloves, the touch was electric, and he immediately let go. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to do that.”

“Ben, what the fuck is wrong with you?” Her eyes welled up with tears and she was on the verge of hyperventilating.

“I don’t know what you mean,” he slurred, pulling away from her.

“You disappeared with no warning or explanation. The only contact I’ve had is with droids and that red-haired fuck and, quite frankly, he’s a terrible conversationalist,” she chided, her face flushed.

Kylo drew close to her so their faces were only inches apart. “What did he do to you?”

She looked away.

Kylo grabbed either side of the contraption. “What did he do to you?” he asked again, breathing heavily.

“Nothing, he...” Rey looked away.

“Rey, please. Tell me.” His dark brown eyes pleaded with hers.

“I don’t owe you any explanation,” she spat. “Especially not when you’re drunk.”

He narrowed his eyes but didn’t pull away. “I need to know so I can help you. I can’t help you if you don’t tell me.”

“Well, for starters he stopped feeding me completely. I don’t know how long it’s been, but I can’t take it anymore. He said you told him how durable us force-sensitives are, so he wanted to test it,” she added as an accusation and she could see that it stung by the grimace on his face.

Kylo growled and gritted his teeth. “I didn’t know that. If I did, I would’ve stopped him.”

“Then where were you? Having a little party while the rest of us suffered from your negligence?” She knew she was treading on dangerous waters, but she didn’t care.

Finally, he backed off and turned his head so she couldn’t see the pain written so clearly on his face. His façade was breaking after all this time and she would be there to witness it. “I- I have to go,” he said, but he stayed rooted in place.

“Wait! Ben, please stay.” When he remained, she smiled weakly and said, “Please look at me.” She felt a familiar urge to reach out and soothe him despite his deplorable behavior. Though he was evil, he was still human.

He sighed deeply. “What do you want from me, Rey?” His voice was heavy and laden with sadness. “I’m so tired of our little game.” He met her gaze and she noted the deadness in his eyes.

“What game?”

“Really?” he scoffed. “What game? The endless chase! How long before you escape, and we go back to square one? I can’t bear to do this to you anymore. I mean... I can’t bear to _do this_ anymore,” he corrected, but the damage was already done.

“Ben, what are you saying?”

“I don’t know, Rey! You confuse me. Ever since I felt your presence you’ve confused me,” he explained moving toward her again. “When I’m with you I... I don’t know,” he slurred looking away, fluttering his hands in the air. “Rey... I think I... I think I lo-”

“Don’t,” she interrupted. They stared at one another for what felt like an eternity. She began to sob uncontrollably. The starvation had taken its toll and she snapped. She cried all of the tears she’d refused to cry, and in front of him, nonetheless. “Go away!” she groaned, dreading the implications of allowing him to see her like this.

Instead, he walked over to the nearest wall and slid down it. He closed his eyes and breathed while she cried. And without either one realizing it, they drifted off to sleep.

* * *

“Ben?” Rey yawned. He was just within eyesight.

Kylo squinted his eyes open, the harsh fluorescent lighting driving a wedge into his skull. “Shit, what time is it?” He smacked his mouth against the fuzziness of his tongue. He reached his hand out next to him to locate the sound of the voice, not yet remembering where he was.

“Oh, that’s nice.” Rey chastised angrily.

“What?” Kylo asked, orienting himself to the sound of her voice. “Rey!” His heart skipped a beat when he finally focused his eyes on her.

“Surprised? Or were you expected another woman in your bed last night?” she asked with reddened cheeks, though that was difficult to see underneath the bruising Hux left behind.

“Oh my god, _no_. Why would you care anyway?” he asked hopefully, but she ignored him.

“I’m surprised you’re awake already. You were... really drunk last night.”

“I seem to remember someone waking me up,” he replied grouchily, rubbing his face. He stood on wobbly legs and walked towards her. “Fuck, he really did a number on you. I’m sorry. I should’ve been here. And I shouldn’t have told him about the hunger thing. I swear I didn’t do it to hurt you,” he promised, looking earnestly into her eyes.

“It’s fine,” Rey said, trying to avoid his gaze.

He searched the nearby cabinets and found a cooling pack. He brought it just above her face. “May I?” he asked.

Rey took a deep breath and nodded, noticing the nervousness in his voice. It was strange hearing the Sith Lord Kylo Ren sound so uncertain.

He lightly pressed the compact to her temple where the bruising was most severe, careful not to brush his fingers against her skin. She flinched at the cold but settled into the relief quickly. “Thank you, Ben.”

Kylo sighed. “Why do you insist on calling me that?” he asked annoyed.

“Why does it bother you so much?” she retorted defiantly.

“Come on, Rey, cut the tough guy routine. I genuinely want to know.” He moved the compress to the other side of her face.

“Fine,” she said, a hint of embarrassment showing through in her tone. “It’s because I think he’s still in there. And I... I’m afraid that if everyone forgets that, you’ll forget that too.”

“And if I forget it?”

“I won’t be able to save you,” she said quietly.

He removed the compress and rummaged in the cabinets once more. He dressed the open wounds Hux left on her face with what supplies he could identify. “Feel better?” he asked warmly.

Rey nodded.

“Let’s get you some food then.”

“Oh, thank god.”

Kylo chuckled and pressed his finger to a button. “Send food for myself and the prisoner.” The droid on the other line responded with several beeps and disconnected. “So...” he said awkwardly. “I guess we wait.”

“Yup.”

“Rey, I... About last night. Before we fell asleep, we were talking...”

“Ben, I’d rather not talk about it,” she said, pursing her lips.

“I know, I just wanted to say that I was drunk and didn’t really mean any of it.” His voice was hollow and distant.

Rey felt a pang in her chest and swallowed roughly. “Of course. I assumed as much.”

“Good.”

“Yes. Good.”

They sat in silence for a few minutes waiting for the droid to arrive with their food. Finally, it came through the doors. Kylo braced himself for a member of the Council that entered after the droid, his muscles taut. He wasn’t sure what his reception would be after his display the night before. 

“My Lord,” he said mildly, bowing low. “That was quite the performance.” He was the most senior member under Kylo and had significant sway with the rest of the Council.

Kylo laughed under his breath. “Hux had to be punished. He stepped way out of line.” The familiar ruthlessness crept back into his voice and it sent a chill down Rey’s spine.

“I certainly agree. He’s been challenging your authority for a long time with no real consequences. We were beginning to think you went soft,” he said clasping his hands behind his back.

“Ha! I’m not much of a politician, General. Excuse me if my behavior has been erratic.”

“That’s precisely why I’m here,” he said. He glanced at Rey. “You dressed her wounds.” Though it was a simple statement, the implication was clear. “My Lord, it might be more appropriate for us to continue this conversation in private.”

“No,” Kylo said at once, bristling. “It’s okay.” Part of him wanted to further gain her trust, but he was also wary of following the general into a trap. He doubted the man was suicidal enough to attempt an assassination, but it was too risky. His hangover dulled his senses like the thick fogs of Kashyyyk, and he wasn’t keen on testing his abilities in this state.

“Very well,” the general said with obvious disdain on his face. “As Supreme Leader, your actions have more significant consequences than when you were Lord Snoke’s apprentice. As such, the Council believes it wise that you consider bringing a political strategist into your employ.” He paused to gauge Kylo’s reaction. “Lord Snoke ignored this suggestion, and if I may speak candidly, we believe this was to the detriment of the Order. Fear is a powerful means of control, but with too much reliance on it, resistance always rises.”

Kylo listened intently to the man. The general was bold to openly question Snoke’s rule, but Kylo couldn’t deny his claim. Since the fall of his grandfather, the subjects under the regime’s rule grew increasingly restless, and Snoke’s blatant disregard for their lives did nothing to help. Kylo also cared nothing for his subjects, but he recognized the need to appear benevolent at times in order to maintain some semblance of order. “Alright,” he said. “Where do I find him?”

Rey listened silently to the men discuss the politics of the Order in disgust. Kylo would manipulate the people into believing him a fit ruler. The thought repulsed her.

“Actually, my Lord, we’ve already selected someone for you, should she meet your approval.”

Rey felt a twinge of jealousy which Kylo sensed immediately. He looked at her puzzled. “Excellent,” he said. “How long before she arrives on the ship?”

“Tonight, my Lord. We believed you wiser than Lord Snoke, so we already made the arrangements.”

Kylo was annoyed that they acted without his consent, but he let it go. His outburst earned him as much.

“There’s one other matter we need to discuss,” the general said, flicking his eyes to Rey.

“I think we’ve discussed enough,” Kylo warned. The feelings of the Council were important, but he was Supreme Leader and they needed to be reminded of their place.

“Of course, my Lord,” the general said bowing. “I will leave you then. You will be notified when your political advisor arrives.”

“Take the droid with you,” he commanded, afraid that it was sent to record he and Rey.

“Of course, my Lord.”

As soon as the doors whooshed close, Kylo turned to Rey with a mischievous expression on his face. “What was that about?” he asked with a goofy grin.

“What was _what _about?” She tried to play dumb, but she knew she messed up when she let her emotions get away from her.

“You know what I’m talking about.” He casually walked towards her with a smug grin.

“Ben, you’re ridiculous,” she said rolling her eyes.

“Tell me and I’ll let you eat.”

“You wouldn’t do that.” She narrowed her eyes at him. She may have lost the upper hand, but she knew he was bluffing.

“Are you so sure?” he teased. Her stomach growled and immediate concern lined his brow. “Fine,” he conceded. Without warning he released the restraints on her arms and chest.

Her breath caught and she hesitated, unsure of what to do with the most freedom she’d had in months. Then, without thinking, she attempted a force push on Kylo.

“You’ve still got the collar on, dummy.”

His tone was light, but she saw sadness in his eyes. She felt guilty for trying to attack him and felt angry at her guilt. “I’m not hungry,” she stated instead of apologizing. _I don’t owe him anything._

He shrugged. “Your funeral.” He hungrily ate the meal in front of him.

She bit her lip staring at him. The tray looked comically small in his hands and she laughed.

“What’s so funny?”

“Nothing. Give me the food,” she huffed.

Kylo smiled and moved a tray table over to her. He watched her delicately pick up the fork and ease it into the food. Everything she did seemed deliberate, thought out. She was everything he wasn’t. “Do you like it?”

“Honestly, the portions on Jakku would taste like a five-star meal, I’m so hungry,” she laughed in between bites.

They ate the rest of their meal in silence, and though they kept their feelings guarded, they were both grateful to be in one another’s company.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Right now it is important to support the global Black Lives Matter movement. Read a book on white privilege, have difficult conversations with your friends, amplify black voices on social media, protest, donate money, donate supplies to protestors! Message me for some more resources on how you can help <3


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey is jealous of Kylo's new adviser and he won't let it go.

After they finished their meal, Kylo made an excuse to leave, promising he would be back to see her later that day. He felt bad lying, but the hangover wasn’t anywhere near leaving. Back in his chambers, he took a couple shots and savored the immediate relief it gave him. “Best way to cure a hangover,” he muttered to himself and got into the shower. The water was near scalding, but it felt good to feel such intense sensations on his skin. He let the water fall down his body, taking comfort in its warmth. He closed his eyes and imagined Rey standing next to him, her body glistening. His cock immediately responded, but he stopped himself. His feelings for her were already too powerful and he couldn’t risk further complicating them. He would have to refrain from masturbating until he could get off to somebody else.

Before he left the room, he pocketed a small bottle of liquor. He didn’t want a repeat of the previous night, but he needed to steady his nerves. He had a lot of explaining to do to a lot of people and he wasn’t prepared to do it sober. He had smoothed things over with Rey as best as he could tell, but he couldn’t shake the feeling of dread that arose when he thought of meeting with the political advisor.

When he finally received the call that she was ready to see him, he had a sufficient buzz and felt notably better than he did that morning. He entered the meeting room fully clad in his usual attire. He wanted his first impression to be as intimidating as possible. She was seated at a large table in the center of the room and rose to greet him. He was stunned by her appearance. She was beautiful by any standards, her round, blue face unblemished and smooth. Her lekku wound around her neck and sensuously framed her large breasts. Her top exposed her bare midriff, toned to perfection, and her skin-tight pants revealed voluptuous curves.

“Pleased to meet you, Supreme Leader Ren,” she said bowing, accentuating her cleavage. “My name is Eyal’bibe.”

“You’re not what I expected,” he said bluntly, taking a seat.

She followed suit, resting her elbows on the table and cupping her chin in her hands. “Because I am a Twi’lek?” she mused.

“Yes.”

“And because I am so beautiful?”

Kylo was grateful he chose to wear his helmet that hide the look of surprise on his face. “It’s true the Order isn’t known for it’s beauty,” he said, hoping his voice was even.

“Mmm,” she hummed. “But I have heard many rumors of the dashingly handsome leader of the Order.” She pushed her chest out slightly as she said this.

“Enough with the flattery,” he said icily. “Tell me why I should keep you in my employ.” He was pleased that she never lost composure for even a moment with his sudden change of tone. He needed an advisor that could play her cards close to the chest.

“My Lord, your empire is beginning to crumble. The unabated cruelty of your reign has created unrest throughout the galaxy, which the Rebellion has capitalized on. If you want to keep your hold, you must employ new tactics. There is a delicate relationship between fear and reverence. Right now, you rely too much on fear. I am here to show you how to use both to exercise complete control over your subjects. And to frame your, shall we say, ‘outbursts’ in the most positive way possible,” she said with a cool smile.

“What will change?”

“That is an astute question, my Lord. Nothing much on your behalf, though you will need to make more public appearances in your territories. And I will say nothing of what you have in your pocket.”

“What-”

“Everyone has their vices, Supreme Leader,” she said with a knowing smile. “Though I am afraid we will have to discuss the girl.”

“Why does everyone care so much about her?” he asked in agitation.

“She symbolizes so much. Hope, justice... love," she added, raising an eyebrow. "We need to do something with her soon. The longer she remains in our custody with no word from the Order, the more controversy stirs around her.”

“I’m not letting her go.” His hands balled into fists under the table.

“Oh, of course not, my Lord. I know how much she means to our cause.”

Kylo couldn’t help but feel she was patronizing him. “Get on with your point,” he said through gritted teeth.

“We should issue an official statement. Preferably with a timestamped image of her to show she is unharmed.”

He scoffed. “You may want to wait a few days. Hux did a number on her.”

“Yes, I was made aware of that terrible incident. With your permission, I would like to send a medical droid to properly dress her wounds. Within two days she should be presentable enough to make an appearance.”

“Of course, send it in now.” He felt like an ass for not sending one sooner and prayed she wouldn’t try anything since her arms were free.

Eyal’bibe pressed a delicate finger to the comm and made the request. “I am glad we are already making new strides together, my Lord. Now. A still image of her will help, but I wonder if we cannot get her to agree to a press conference of sorts. We will announce it only to relevant members of the Order, but we will leak it to the press a week before so there will be galaxy-wide coverage. She will say a few words and convince the public that the Order is not as terrible as the Rebellion suggests, and more importantly that _you_ are not as terrible as the Rebellion suggests.”

“She won’t go for it.”

“What about that Jedi mind-trick I have heard so much about? Or we could point a blaster at her offscreen.”

“No,” he said firmly. “That won’t work. I’ll talk to her and see if I can convince her.”

“Oh? You think that will work?”

“No, but do we have much other choice?”

“You are wise, my Lord. I will leave this to you.” She stood up and walked towards him, her hips swaying gracefully. “If you need me, call me on my private line.” She handed him a small communicator. Through his gloves, he felt her fingertips brush against his and wondered if it was intentional. “Not many people get the privilege of having this,” she added with a wink.

“As your Supreme Leader, I don’t consider it a privilege, but an entitlement.”

“I like that even better,” she said as she walked past him, brushing against his shoulder. She stopped when she reached the door and looked back at him over her shoulder. “My Lord? Do you mind if I stop by and see the prisoner? I think it will help me better plan our movements going forward.”

“You can only see her if I’m with you. That applies to everyone on this ship,” he said crisply.

“Yes. Well then. Shall we be on our way?”

* * *

Thirty minutes later, they both stood in front of the door. “I removed some of her restraints. I need her to trust me.”

“Of course,” she said in an exaggerated tone, nodding her head.

They entered the room and Kylo almost burst out laughing at Rey’s face. Her eyes bulged out of her head as she examined the beautiful Twi’lek walking beside him. “Rey, this is Eyal’bibe. She’s my new political advisor. She wanted to meet you personally.” He gestured her forward and Eyal’bibe approached.

“I must say I am honored to be in the presence of such a powerful Jedi. You have caused the Order many problems.”

Rey looked at Kylo, but he was impossible to read with his helmet on. “What do you want?”

“I like a woman that is direct. It means she knows what she wants.”

Rey swore she saw Eyal’bibe glance at Kylo after she said that. “Get on with it.”

“I just wanted to introduce myself,” she said innocently. “After all, I will be spending a significant amount of time with the Supreme Leader, and you demand a lot of his attention.”

Rey glared at her and said nothing.

“But I will leave you to it. I have other important matters to attend to for now.” She paused when she passed Kylo and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Do you need anything else, my Lord?”

He shrugged her off and replied with a gruff “No.”

The doors closed behind her and Rey anxiously pushed her hair behind her ears. “You could’ve warned me, you know.”

“I’m sorry, this all happened rather suddenly.”

“Can you take off that stupid mask?”

“You sound irritated.” He was afraid she would smell the alcohol on his breath if he removed it.

“I am _not _irritated,” she declared resolutely, though her furrowed brow betrayed her. “Look, I’m not going to talk to you until you take that thing off. What, did she leave lipstick on your face and you’re afraid to show me?”

“So, you are jealous,” he said, feeling victorious.

“What! Me? Jealous?” The word rolled slowly off her tongue. “You’re insane.”

Kylo laughed. “I knew it.”

“I’m not talking to you, remember?” She looked at him indignantly and crossed her arms over her chest.

“Fine.” He pulled off his helmet and set it down on a nearby table. “Happy?”

“No,” she said dramatically. “Why are you standing so far away?” she asked suspiciously.

“Would you like me to be closer?”

She didn’t like the insinuation in his voice. “No, it just seems odd to have a conversation with someone ten feet away from them.”

He took a few steps closer. “Better?”

“You’re acting very strange today.” She couldn’t keep the smile from her face. She was afraid that he would stop visiting like he had before, leaving her alone. But here he was. A part of her was more than relieved, however. A part of her was excited. Her heart pounded as she came to the realization.

“And your heart is beating incredibly fast for someone that isn’t moving.” He ventured a few more steps forward, too intrigued by her physiological response to him to consider the consequences of the stench of alcohol. With each step forward, her heart beat faster.

“Stop doing that!” she commanded.

“Stop doing what?”

“Reading my pulse, it’s creepy.”

“I think you’re just embarrassed.”

“Am not.”

He stood in front of her, his body towering over hers.

“You’ve been drinking,” she accused.

He flinched and brought a hand to the back of his neck. “We all have our vices.”

“Are you drunk?”

“No, not really. I’ve just maintained a steady buzz today. I haven’t had anything to drink in a couple hours.”

“’Just a couple hours,’” she mocked.

“You’re an asshole.” He glowered at her from beneath his mop of hair.

“And you’re a drunk,” she jabbed.

“And you’re impossible,” he said, lowering his face to hers. They stared into one another’s eyes and both their hearts pounded in their ears.

Rey panicked and tried to push him back, her hands pressing into his chest, but he gently grabbed her wrists and held them by her side. “Rey,” he said softly, holding her gaze. “I messed up last night. I... I didn’t mean to touch you. At least, that’s not how I envisioned it happening.”

She was awestruck at the level of sensitivity in his eyes. He was an entirely different person from the one who wore the helmet. And if he had pictured touching her for the first time, what did that mean? Her chest moved rapidly with each shallow breath.

“I’m going to let go of your wrists. Please don’t try to fight me.” He released them, poised to grab them again in case she struggled, but she remained still. He brought his hands in front of him and slowly pulled his gloves off, one finger at a time. He dropped them to the ground and reached a hand slowly toward Rey. “May... May I?” he asked. He felt completely exposed.

Rey stared at him for what was an impossible amount of time, her mind grappling with the conflicted feelings inside her. She didn’t know what was happening. She should hate the man in front of her, and she did for a very long time. She hated Kylo Ren and what he did to her, to her friends, to the galaxy. But this wasn’t Kylo Ren. This was Ben. A man capable of compassion, of... She couldn’t bring herself to say it. A single tear fell down her face and she nodded her head yes.

He used his thumb to wipe the tear and the connection between them hummed with energy. It was a foreign feeling to both of them in its intensity, but familiar in its passion. The feelings of love and hate between them merged and disentangled in a continuous loop. He brought both hands to cup her face and breathed in the sensation.

“Ben...” Rey stammered and brought her hands to touch his. “I don’t understand.”

“Yes, you do.” He leaned forward so his lips were only inches from hers. “You feel it too.”

“No,” she said squeezing her eyes shut. Her head swam with renewed energy as the bond between them steadied into a harmonious rhythm.

“Rey,” he breathed.

She opened her eyes and looked at him fearfully. “I’m scared.” Her voice was a whisper.

“I know,” he said, and moved forward, pressing his lips against hers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Right now it is important to support the global Black Lives Matter movement. Read a book on white privilege, have difficult conversations with your friends, amplify black voices on social media, protest, donate money, donate supplies to protestors! Message me for some more resources on how you can help <3


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Passions ignite, and they take a risky step forward to give their relationship a chance.

The kiss was gentle, far gentler than she ever expected he was capable of, and she returned it with a sense of urgency. Their lips connected for moments more when Kylo pulled away. He searched her face for some sign of fear or anger, convinced he’d hallucinated her returning the kiss. Instead, he found a bashful smile.

“Well... That was unexpected,” she offered, unsure of what to say.

“Yeah.” His hands still held her face, afraid to let go and break the spell that held the moment together. “Was... Was that okay?” he asked timidly.

Rey laughed and her cheeks reddened. “Yes. It was. More than okay,” she said, her cheeks turning an even deeper shade of red.

He released his hands to brush loose hair off her brow. He felt the sudden urge to hold her close to him and sighed in frustration.

“What is it?” Rey asked, fearful that he regretted kissing her.

“I wish we knew each other in a different timeline,” he said, and Rey saw pain in his eyes. “This one is terrible because I can only know you as a prisoner or an apprentice. And me your enemy or your master.”

They were silent for a time, contemplating the nature of their relationship and the implications of the kiss. Finally, Rey broke the silence. “Ben, you have to let me go. This is crazy. It won’t work.”

“Is that what this is about for you? Whoring your way into freedom?” he asked with a sneer.

The insult cut her to her core, and she smacked him so hard her palm stung. “You’re telling me this isn’t about bringing me to the dark side?” she accused, massaging her hand.

“You’re acting like a child,” he chided, bringing his hand to rub his cheek.

“You started it!” she yelled. Her anger was getting away from her.

“Temper, temper,” he teased. “Remember your feelings, Rey, or I won’t even have to try to turn you.”

“See? Everything always comes back to this. To the dark side.” Her fury increased as his words validated her suspicion.

“C’mon, Rey, I was joking. You know me better than that.” The acid in his voice lessened as he tried to defuse the situation.

She knew she was being unfair but refused to take the high road. “Do I? You’re my god damned captor, Ben! How can I trust you?” She was crying again, unable to regulate her emotions after being in captivity for so long.

Kylo attempted to place a comforting hand on her shoulder but she shrugged him off. _God dammit, Rey. You make this so difficult. _“I’ll let you in,” he said. She eyed him cautiously. “If I let you in will you believe me?”

She sniffled and nodded her head. “Yes.”

He tenderly held her hand and opened the connection between them. They were both better prepared for the onrush of emotions, but it was still incredibly powerful. He allowed her to read his intentions behind the kiss and even allowed her to skim the surface of his feelings for her. He needed this to work, not for the Order or for the legacy of the Sith, but for his own sake. He felt her disconnect after they’d spent a few minutes mentally tethered and released her hand. “So?” he posed awkwardly.

Rey threw her arms around his neck and pulled him close. He wrapped his arms around her as best he could with her still partially restrained. She nuzzled her face into his neck. “It’s been a long time since someone held me like this,” she sighed.

“I killed the last person that held me like this,” he said sardonically.

Rey pulled back from his embrace, concern on her face.

“Too soon?” he joked.

“That’s not funny.”

“I know,” he said with a laugh.

“Do you though?”

Kylo rolled his eyes and stretched his arms above his head. “I’m moving you to my chambers,” he stated.

“What? When did you decide this?” Rey asked in surprise.

“Just now. Here, let me help you with these,” he commanded and removed the rest of the restraints without warning, though he left the force-restraining collar around her neck.

Rey nearly collapsed to the floor when the restraints fell away, but Kylo steadied her. Her legs weren’t used to carrying her full weight and it took several minutes of stretching and walking around for her to be able to move comfortably. It felt incredible to be free from the restraints. Daily exercise had always been a part of her life as a scavenger, so it felt especially unnatural for her to be restricted for so long. “How do you plan on getting me to your quarters?” she asked, bending down once more to touch her toes.

He couldn’t help but admire her ass as she bent over, his cock twitching in his pants. _Not now_, he thought irritated. “I’m not sure,” he said, pushing the perverted thoughts away. “None of this has really gone according to plan,” he admitted. He was beginning to second guess his decision to bring her into his chambers for a number of reasons. First and foremost was the reaction of the Council. But a close second was his physical reaction to her. He wasn’t sure how long he could keep his hormones tempered before she would notice. “I can either sneak you in, which sounds damn near impossible, or I can make an ordeal of it.”

“Neither of those hardly sound favorable.”

“I know, but we don’t have many other options. If you...” His voice trailed off into silence.

“What?”

“You can pretend to turn to the dark side.”

“What? You’re insane if you think I’d do anything like that.”

“It’s the only thing that will make sense. It’s either that or I leave you in here tied up.” Admittedly, the thought aroused him.

She wrinkled her nose and shook her head. “We could always go back to the Rebellion,” she said hopefully. “They’ll give you another chance if I ask them to.”

Kylo rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Rey, I don’t have the energy to have that conversation again. You know my answer.”

“I know,” she said, her lip pouting. “I just figured it might be worth a try.”

He reached out and held her hands. “If you do this, no one on the outside will believe you. Not unless you make an appearance as my apprentice, which I won’t make you do.”

“And how long will that hold out?”

“I’m not sure, Rey. But I know that we’ll figure something out. I’m willing to do damn near anything to make this work.”

“Everything except leave the Order,” she said solemnly.

“Please, Rey? This is about more than the Rebellion or the Order.”

She opened her mouth to protest, but the look in his eyes melted her heart. His expression was so sincere that, despite how self-centered the comment was, she couldn’t bring herself to disagree. “Oh, Ben,” she sighed. The current passing between their hands made it difficult for her to resist, as well as the prospect of living beyond the walls of the interrogation room. “Okay. I’ll do it,” she said, and he leaned down for one more passionate kiss before everything changed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Right now it is important to support the global Black Lives Matter movement. Read a book on white privilege, have difficult conversations with your friends, amplify black voices on social media, protest, donate money, donate supplies to protestors! Message me for some more resources on how you can help <3


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey learns that Kylo isn't the only one that needs to change, and intimacy begins to develop between them.

Rey paced the floor, biting her fingernails to the nub. Kylo left her alone while he made arrangements for her transfer as he called it, and all she could do was wait. Occasionally her hand absentmindedly pulled at the force-dampening collar wrapped around her neck, bringing thoughts of her utterly hopeless situation. She had kissed the man she was supposed to destroy and agreed to play make-believe like she was a child. How long could they keep this up without others growing suspicious? And sooner or later the Rebellion would come to save her. What then? She was beginning to accept that he would never defect from the First Order. There was no happy ending for them. She gave up on pacing and sat on the floor hugging her knees to her chest. _When will this nightmare end?_

The doors slid open and Kylo entered followed by a barrage of stormtroopers. “Stand up,” one of them said, stepping forward. Behind her, two stormtroopers followed, their guns pointed at Rey. The woman placed cuffs around Rey’s wrists and ankles and stepped back. Rey glared at Kylo, unsure of what to think. She’d been in his mind, she knew that his words were genuine, but this all felt too real. She grunted in surprise when the stormtrooper brought a cloth and tied it over her eyes. “Is this really necessary?” she asked, her voice strained.

“Follow me,” Kylo replied plainly, his voice distorted by the helmet.

They walked briskly through the corridors and Rey felt naked. She was perfectly capable of defending herself without her powers, but she’d lost the sixth sense she had subconsciously relied upon her entire life. She was quite literally blind behind enemy lines and she couldn’t shake the feeling of discomfort in the pit of her stomach, despite Kylo’s earlier promise.

At last, the party stopped before a set of doors and Kylo roughly pulled her forward by her wrists. “You will stay here until I say otherwise.” He pulled off the blindfold, pushed her through the doors, and left without another word.

The doors stayed open just long enough for her to see several stormtroopers standing guard outside. She blinked her eyes and took a moment to survey her new prison cell. The metal walls were dented in several spots and various bottles of liquor lined the wall opposite her. There was a small living area with a large, dark-gray couch and a small glass table, and to the left a small bathroom. She moved further into the room with careful steps and saw a large opening to the bedroom.

What caught her eye, though, was a large window, the size of the entire wall, in the bedroom. She moved towards it and shivered as goosebumps prickled on her skin, rubbing her arms for warmth. “What kind of psychopath keeps his room this cold,” she asked aloud. The bedroom was spacious, and a king-sized bed sat against the far wall, standing parallel to the window. She approached the glass and lightly touched her fingertips to its surface.

For as long as she was held captive, she longed to see outside of her prison but being a thin pane of glass away from freedom stung to her core. They were stationed outside of some planet, though Rey had no way of identifying it. From her vantage point, it seemed small and unimpressive, a mess of green and orange twisting to form grotesque shapes. She shuddered and closed her eyes. She envisioned a fleet of Rebellion ships flying in over the horizon to rescue her led by the brave Poe Dameron. And Finn... Would he look at her the same way when he found out she fell for the enemy? Before she left, they had shared a kiss, and though she hadn’t made any promises, there were certain expectations in place upon her return. She held herself against the window, slowly slid to the floor, and cried, her body shaking. _What am I doing here? I was a fool to think I could turn him._ She sat huddled in a ball and drifted into a restless sleep.

Kylo returned later that evening, annoyed that he was kept from her for so long. He walked through the doors expecting to see her eagerly awaiting his arrival, but the room was dark, and he didn’t see her. For a moment, he panicked, afraid she had somehow managed to escape. He quickly moved to the bedroom where he saw her asleep against the window. He frowned slightly as he took in the scene. Her face was puffy; obviously she’d been crying. And she fell asleep looking out the window, probably envisioning herself far away from him. He felt awkward, unsure of what to do. He wanted to carry her to the bed but thought better of it. Though they hadn’t explicitly discussed boundaries, he intuited she wouldn’t appreciate the gesture. He grabbed a pillow and set it beside her and covered her with a blanket as best he could. Pleased with his decision as he was, he was uncomfortable with the idea of him sleeping in a bed while she was on the floor and opted to sleep on the couch instead.

He grabbed a bottle from the shelf and poured himself a tall drink, settling into the couch to unwind. He turned on an old holovid and watched with the volume low, welcoming the warmth in his belly with each sip of his drink. He tried to remain awake in the hopes that Rey would wake up and join him, but his eyes grew heavy. With thoughts of the new developments on his mind, he fell asleep.

Several times in the night, Rey awoke with a start, but stubbornly refused to move. She heard Kylo snoring softly in the other room and didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of recognizing her discomfort. Besides, she had endured sleeping arrangements in much less comfortable positions than the one she was in now. Still, she pulled the blanket close to her body and lay her head on the pillow Kylo left her.

In the morning, Kylo’s voice carried out of the bathroom and stirred her. She yawned and tried to stretch her limbs, but the restraints held them close together. _Fuck_, she thought. She opened her eyes long enough to see steam coming from the open bathroom directly ahead. She heard Kylo singing quietly to himself and smiled. There was something special about observing him from the sidelines when he didn’t have to pretend to be anybody but himself. She sat there silently, listening with her eyes closed in a state of half-sleep until she heard the scrape of a shower curtain. The abrupt noise snapped her eyes open and she saw Kylo emerging wet from the shower. Her eyes traveled from his head down his muscular torso and stopped when they reached his cock, hanging flaccid between his legs.

“Shit!” she whispered, squeezing her eyes shut. She breathed deeply to steady herself so he wouldn’t detect her heart racing. _1, 2, 3, 4, 5. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5._ She repeated the mantra and steadied herself as she pushed the image of Kylo’s naked body from her mind. He stepped out from the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist and Rey pretended to be asleep.

Kylo glanced at Rey as he stepped out of the bathroom and shook his head in amazement. _Man, the girl can sleep_. He glanced at the clock anxiously and noted the time. _9:01. If I don’t do it now, she’ll wake up and I won’t get a chance. _He lifted a bottle off the shelf as quietly as possible and flicked his eyes toward her once more to make sure she was still asleep. His hands shook as he screwed off the lid, the metal scraping the glass bottle as he lifted the cap up. He brought the bottle to his lips and froze; Rey’s eyes were throwing daggers.

“Rey... Uh... You’re awake,” he said lowering the bottle.

“Starting early, are we? Or is this late?”

Kylo set the bottle down heavily. He leaned against the wall and crossed his arms. “I thought you were asleep.” He noticed how her eyes traveled his muscled torso and smirked.

“That shouldn’t make a difference.” She tried to look dignified, but it was nearly impossible with her hands and ankles cuffed.

“Are you still angry about yesterday?” he asked, lifting his hands to mimic restraint.

“It’s not about that,” she huffed. “But yes,” she said, pointing her chin up.

“If you asked nicely, they would’ve been off by now,” he said as he grabbed a device from the table. He approached her and pressed it to the locks, releasing her hands and feet.

“Thanks,” she muttered, rubbing her wrists and ankles.

“I planned on taking them off before you went to sleep,” he clarified, sitting down next to her. “It was just for show. But I got held up and didn’t want to wake you when I came in.” He leaned his head back against the glass and stared straight ahead.

Rey’s heart fluttered at the heat of his body radiating so close to hers. She examined his face and he looked exhausted. Premature lines showed themselves even when he was expressionless and dark circles framed his eyes. He turned his head and caught her staring and she quickly looked away, fidgeting mindlessly with her shirt.

“You can talk to me. You don’t have to belittle me to get answers,” he said calmly.

“You’re one to talk,” she retorted.

“That’s exactly what I’m talking about,” he said, a hint of irritation edging his voice. “I know I’m not perfect, believe me. But give me a break. I’m really trying here.”

“Ben, this is very bizarre,” she said drawing her knees into her chest. “It’s stressing me out.”

“I know it isn’t easy but... I just need you to talk to me. Talk to me like I’m one of your friends from the Rebellion.”

Her stomach tightened in response. “I know you’re not trying to be an ass, but you just can’t say things like that. I need you to leave them out of this. It’s... It’s too painful.”

He patted her arm. “I’m sorry, Rey. This is weird for me too. I’m not used to considering someone else’s feelings.”

She looked over at him and chuckled. “I can’t believe this is happening. And that you tried to comfort me by patting my arm,” she added, nudging him with an elbow.

“What can I say, I’m a product of my environment,” he said, shrugging his shoulders.

“But what about Leia?” she asked, hoping the subject wouldn’t anger him. “I’m sure she did more than pat your shoulder when you were upset.”

“That was a long time ago,” he said darkly.

They sat there in silence for a minute before Rey leaned her head against his arm, blushing, and both of their pulses quickened momentarily. After a minute more, Kylo began to inch his hand closer to hers. His heart pounded in his ears and he knew she could detect it, but he continued anyway. For some reason, this small act terrified him more than kissing her for the first time. His fingers brushed against hers and paused for a cue. Her fingers remained still, encouraging him, and he slowly wrapped his hand around hers. She opened her fingers and interlaced them with his. He let out a contented sigh kissed the top of her head in an unexpected show of intimacy.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey has a hard time denying Kylo's advances and enjoys her alone time. Eyal'bibe (OC) and Kylo meet to discuss political strategies. Heavy petting in this chapter. Legitimate smut is coming next chapter, I promise!

Her stomach grumbled and it broke them from their trance.

“I’ll order us some food,” he said, moving to stand.

Rey held him back momentarily to plant a kiss on his cheek.

He smiled and gripped her chin in his hand, pulling her towards him. They kissed gently at first, softly moving their lips in unison. Then Kylo pressed hard against her and nibbled on her bottom lip, eliciting a moan from Rey, eager to accept his advances. Encouraged by her enthusiasm, he slowly worked his tongue into her mouth and gripped her hips with his hands, closing the distance between them.

The physical connection was unlike anything he had ever experienced. Their force bond enhanced every movement, so the slightest touch caused his cock to throb with need. “Oh, Rey...” he whispered, breaking away to plant soft kisses along her jaw, his hands moving up her body. He’d waited so long for this moment and moved aggressively, pawing at her body with fervent desire. He momentarily lost himself in the thrill of her touch, the taste of her skin, when she abruptly pushed him off.

“Ben, wait,” she said shakily. “This is all moving really fast.” She nervously tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and kept her gaze fixed on the floor.

He couldn’t deny his irritation but forced himself to remain calm. “Is it your first time?” he asked gently.

“Ben!” she exclaimed. “What the hell-”

“Remember what we just talked about,” he reminded her, emphasizing the ‘just.’

“Right, sorry, well... That was incredibly uncalled for,” she said blushing. “No, it’s not my first time, and even if it were, I just want to take things slow. I mean, just yesterday you had me tied up in a cell.” She risked a glance his way and smiled when she saw his receptivity.

“Shit, I didn’t mean anything by it. I’m sorry.”

“Yes, you did mean something by it,” she chided, though in good humor. She clasped her hands and brought them theatrically under her chin. “As if the only girl who could possibly resist your undeniable wit and charm is pure and unspoiled.” She blinked her eyes several times for effect.

“Okay, fine, I get it,” he grumbled, feeling self-conscious. “Thanks for not yelling at me,” he added.

“You’re welcome. Thanks for listening.”

“I guess this isn’t as impossible as we thought, huh?”

“Don’t get your hopes up. It’s only day one,” she said dramatically.

“Well it won’t be possible if you keep saying shit like that,” he laughed, poking her in the ribs.

She let out a yelp and backed away from him as quickly as possible. “None of that!” she giggled. “I haven’t even eaten breakfast yet,” and, as if on cue, her stomach growled.

He lifted his hands in surrender. “Let me get us some breakfast then,” and he walked into the living room.

Kylo ordered two meals to be delivered over the comm and turned to see Rey staring gloomily at the bottles of liquor. “You’re welcome to use the shower,” he said, hoping to distract her.

“I’ll wait ‘til you’re gone. But I could use a toothbrush.”

“There’s one in there for you,” he said, gesturing to the bathroom. As much as he loved the last two days, he was certainly excited for her to take a bath. _If only she’d do it while I’m here_, he thought, allowing his mind to wander.

A small LEP droid entered the room, carrying their meals on a dull, metal platter. “Here you are,” it said, placing the platter on the table. If Rey didn’t know any better, she would say it sounded nervous. It stood stock still as it awaited further instruction from Kylo.

“Dismissed,” he said curtly.

“Yes, sir,” it said, waddling out of the room.

“That was an oddly quiet LED droid,” she prodded.

“Let’s just say I have a certain reputation among them,” he replied with a cringe.

They made it through half the meal when Eyal’bibe chimed in on her private communicator. “Supreme Leader Ren. Do you copy?”

Kylo anxiously grabbed the comm link from the table. “Yes.”

“I am glad you are awake,” she said. “I have some urgent news to discuss with you about our new pet.”

Kylo risked a glance at Rey who was staring fixedly at her plate, her cheeks flushed. “Not ours, mine,” he managed to say, eliciting firm jab in the ribs from Rey’s elbow.

“What?” he mouthed to her.

She shook her head and angrily jammed food into her mouth.

“Of course, my Lord. My apologies. I do wish to speak with you as soon as possible. In the Centura room.”

“I’ll be ready in ten,” he said, switching off the comm without waiting for a reply.

“So, I’m your pet, am I?” she said with a growl.

“Of course not, I was just caught off guard.” He suavely reached his arm around her and nuzzled into her neck.

“No way, that’s not going to make this better. You can’t just... Call me...” She tried to protest but her body persuaded her to comply.

“You _are_ wearing a collar,” he whispered into her ear, causing her skin to prickle. She let out a soft moan as he nibbled her neck, his hands sliding to her waist. “Maybe I’ll get you a leash.”

Rey felt her cunt pulse with heat and her teeth bit into her bottom lip. She didn’t know why his words made her feel that way, like her body was melting beneath his touch, instead of making her want to smack him.

His lips left gentle kisses up and down her neck, following her movements as she stretched to accommodate him. She brought a hand up to the back of his head and wound her fingers into his dark locks. He groaned and ran his tongue from the base of her shoulder to her ear. “Oh, Rey...”

His voice tickled her ear and she squirmed, rubbing her thighs together. She hadn’t felt this aroused in a very long time and it took all of her self-control not to reach a wandering hand into her pants. But then, much to her relief, a different comm rang, drawing his attention away from her body for just long enough to give her space to resist his advances. She was no stranger to sex, but it had the tendency to complicate even the best of situations, and she had no intention of complicating this one further. The comm continued to chime as he turned back to her, ignoring it.

Rey placed a gentle hand on his chest. “You should get that,” she said, hoping he wouldn’t press her. She wasn’t sure how long she could resist him.

Kylo smiled, rolling his eyes dramatically, and pulled her in for one more kiss before he left to answer it. After the call, he set the comm down and sighed.

“Busy day?” she asked lightly.

“If someone offers you the position of Supreme Leader, don’t take it,” he joked with a laugh.

He dressed and knelt before Rey who was on the couch watching holo vids. “Try to stay out of trouble,” he smirked.

“Says the man who throws temper tantrums.” She saw anger flash in his eyes, but it quickly disappeared.

“I’ll see you later,” he said, giving her a quick kiss on the cheek.

The doors closed behind him and she stood excitedly. She was unrestrained and alone, freedoms for which was incredibly grateful. She undressed quickly, undid her hair, and got in the shower, savoring the warmth of the water cascading down her body. Much to her surprise, there were feminine scented shampoos and soaps. Either he had women showering in his room frequently, or he placed them there for her. She blushed, knowing in her gut that this was a gesture he made for her only. She lathered soap into her hands and slowly massaged it around her body. Her muscles ached from being held in that contraption for so long, unable to move, and she felt them release some of the tension. _He owes me a massage_, she thought, her cunt pulsing at the thought. She shook her head and tried to keep her mind clear of Kylo’s erotic threats. She briefly contemplated pressing the removable showerhead to her clit, but immediately dismissed it, feeling shameful for even considering using his things for her pleasure.

She hurried the rest of her shower and emerged feeling renewed. She brushed her teeth using one of the fanciest toothbrushes she’d ever seen and appraised her reflection in the cracked mirror above the sink. She hadn’t seen herself in a mirror since before she was captured, and her reflection surprised her. Her face was gaunt, her high cheekbones accentuated and sharp, and her skin pale. She pursed her lips as she considered the trajectory of her life.

Born a poor scavenger, abandoned by her family, alone and mistrustful of everyone. Then, in one fell swoop, she became the linchpin of the entire Rebellion, the last hope for the rest of the galaxy. She felt foreign occupying the position, and she couldn’t help but worry that one day the Rebellion would wake up and realize she was an imposter and send her back to Jakku.

Her heart hardened and her good mood fell away. She fixed her hair as best as she could given the lack of materials available and looked around for something to wear. She wasn’t prepared to put on the grimy clothes she was captured in, so she nosed her way through the apartment to find something more suitable. In the bedroom, she found a sizeable wardrobe. She pulled on the metal handles and automatic lights shined on a forest of black. “Of course,” she muttered. “He’s like a cartoon character.” She rifled through his things, hoping to find something wearable, despite their extreme difference in size.

She’d gone through the entire rack to no avail when a pile of crumbled material caught her eye. She reached down and picked through the pile, pulling out a long-sleeved top that was much smaller than the rest. She also managed to find some pants that were small enough that she could make them work. She was resourceful and knotted the clothes at strategic points to adjust the fit. When she was done, she looked ridiculous, but she cherished the feeling of the clean clothes.

“Now what?” she mused. She walked back into the living room and puzzled over the space, chewing on the tip of her thumb. “Maybe I can create enough room...” she began and moved the furniture so that she had sufficient space to exercise. Her pulse quickened as she began her warmup calisthenics, jumping jacks, low lunges, high-knees, and the like. As the endorphins began to flow, she lost herself completely in the moment. She moved into a harder workout, stressing her body to the limit with endless pushups, squats, crunches, and other exercises she’d added to her routine over the years. Her body glistened with sweat and shook with overuse, but she refused to stop. It felt good to escape her mind for a period of time. Her anger and helplessness fueled her frenzy and she kept going until her body gave out. “Fuck,” she said, lying on her back, wiping her brow with the back of her arm.

* * *

Kylo arrived in the meeting room in a disinterested mood. He much preferred to spend the day with Rey since things were going so much better than he expected, but he supposed it did him some good to have some time apart. He was obsessed with the girl and every minute he spent with her only increased his need to be with her. Eyal’bibe walked in shortly after he arrived, holding a portfolio in one arm and a small black leather bag in the other.

“Good morning, Supreme Leader,” she said with a bow. “I trust things are proceeding along nicely with the girl?”

He nodded, grateful that she was getting right down to business. He hated nothing more than small talk and ass-kissing.

“Good,” she smiled, holding the bag out to him.

“What’s this?” he asked, waiting for an explanation before he would take it.

She set it down on the table and pulled out a bottle of amber liquid. “I figured you might be needing this,” she said carefully and saw his posture tense.

“How did you know?” He was alarmed but kept his voice even.

“Just a lucky guess,” she said coyly.

“I want an answer.”

_He’s a tough one,_ she thought but tried to keep her face pleasant. “I have been doing this for a long time. I had a feeling Jedi captive, even a turned one, might take issue with day-drinking.”

He opened the cap and cursed himself silently. _Why didn't I leave a hole for drinking?_ He wanted to maintain his mysterious persona, but the thought of a drink made the decision for him. He removed the helmet with a hiss and took a few swigs. “No one else is to know about this,” he said, relieved to feel the warmth of the liquor in his stomach. “Especially not the girl.”

“Discretion is my best quality.”

“Then let’s get started,” he said, taking a seat. She remained remarkably impassive as she gazed upon his face for the first time.

“You have certainly delivered on your promise to turn the girl, which is great news for the Order’s public image. We spoke previously about holding a press conference.”

“That would be unprecedented,” he said, shaking his head.

“Yes, but this is a new age of government. The Empire fell and Snoke is gone. It only takes one brave man to set a new precedent.”

He paused to consider, calling a glass to him with the force and poured a drink for himself. He held the bottle out to Eyal’bibe. “Would you like any?”

“Of course, my Lord.” Eyal wasn’t a heavy drinker, but she learned long ago not to decline an offer from a person in power.

He called over another glass and poured her a drink. “You make a good point,” he said, passing her the glass. “It just can’t be perceived as weak.”

“That is what I am here for,” she said, opening the portfolio in front of her. She tapped on the glass and several files of notes hovered between them. “I worked on this all night.” With two more taps, she focused the hologram on one file. “I have selected a handful of systems where your appearance would have the most impact, but of course, that will be after the press conference with the girl.” She moved her fingers on the screen and the page scrolled down to reveal a script. “This is for the two of you to read,” she said, holding her breath. Inexperienced politicians tended to react negatively to receiving scripts, especially those who were unaware they were a politician.

“I don’t do scripts,” he sneered.

“I understand your hesitancy,” she said smiling and tapped the screen once more. An image of Darth Sidious slowly spun in front of them. “Do you know how the great Darth Sidious came to power?” she asked.

“He was a politician,” Kylo recalled.

“Precisely. His rise to power is a marvel to all who study the art of government.” She brought a clip of him as Senator Palpatine to the screen. It was regarded as the keystone speech of his rise to power. “Senator Palpatine could not have acquired so much power had he not played the part of politician.”

“I already have power, though,” he said stubbornly.

“True, but do you not want more?” Kylo was silent. “Why else take the girl? With her on our side, we have a tremendous opportunity to change the galaxy’s opinion of us while simultaneously tightening our hold upon it.”

“I still don’t do scripts.”

“Senator Palpatine did not write the speech I showed you, nor any others. He was an emperor-to-be. Not a rhetorician.”

Kylo let out a sigh and sipped his drink. “You have one chance,” he warned. “And I’ll make any changes I see fit.”

“Excellent, my Lord. I’ll have a copy delivered to you and the girl shortly.”

He briefly considered the promise he made to Rey. _No public appearances. _“Though she’s turned, it may still take some convincing to get her to do this. This would be a complete betrayal to the Rebellion.”

“I wonder if I could not be of some assistance,” she offered. “Perhaps she would respond better to a woman’s touch,” she said, running her blue fingertips along her lekku.

Kylo swallowed hard against the pornographic image in his mind. “Very well.” _If only for formality’s sake._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had to make a minor change to the scene a little bit as I'm writing a later chapter and realized... He can't wear the mask and drink at the same time!


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smut ahead! Much to Rey's dismay, Kylo discovers her new kink. More smut to come in the next chapter as well.

Rey pushed herself into a sitting position and observed her makeshift outfit, now drenched in sweat. She filled a glass with cool water and drank it down, gripping the edge of the sink for stability. She was shaky, her body fatigued from the intense exertion after being immobile for so long. She filled the glass again and wobbled to the couch, letting out a sigh of relief. “It’s a shame I ruined the only clean clothes I could find,” she muttered, plying the sweat-soaked shirt from her stomach. Suddenly, she had an idea.

She rushed over to the communications console and examined it. _Ben never said I couldn’t use the comm_, she thought excitedly. “Come in. This is Rey, Ben’s prisoner,” she practiced. “No, that’s terrible,” she said, smacking her palm to her forehead. “Come in. This is... This is the Supreme Leader’s... apprentice?” Rey took a deep breath and pressed her thumb to a large, glowing button. “Come in. This is B- the Supreme Leader’s apprentice.” She lifted her thumb to wait for a response, her stomach tied into knots. She knew she was playing with fire, but this would give her a nice approximation of how much real freedom she had. _And of his feelings for me_, she thought, blushing.

“This is Supreme Leader Ren’s private line. No one but the Supreme Leader has permission to use it. How are you accessing his console?” The woman’s voice was lined with suspicion.

“Shit,” she whispered. Pressing her thumb back to the button, she decided to lie. “He’s requested I get new clothing fit for an apprentice of the Order.”

“What is your authorization code?” the woman responded harshly.

“Do you dare question the Supreme Leader?” she threatened, feigning indignancy. Her gut clenched in shame at the thrill she got from abusing her power.

The line was silent for a moment before the woman responded, “Very well. I will send a droid to his private quarters immediately.”

Rey squealed in excitement and quickly showered. She had never been outfitted by a droid before, and she couldn’t remember the last time she picked out new clothes, rather than worked together scraps of whatever was available to her.

A droid arrived within fifteen minutes and cheerily greeted Rey. “Good afternoon, ma’am. I have heard that you are in need of a new wardrobe.”

“Yes, I am,” said Rey, beaming.

“Excellent! My name is service droid LP3K, the galaxy’s finest outfitter. I am enthused to serve you, ma’am.”

“You can just call me Rey.”

“Excellent! Hello Rey. Allow me to show you what preselected options I have available, though do be aware that I am able to customize almost any garment.”

Rey spent the next few hours relishing in the small amount of freedom she swindled. There was a limited color palette available, but she eventually decided several outfits in a variety of muted reds, greys, and off-whites.

“These are fantastic, LP3.”

“Excellent! It is my humble duty to serve. That will be 10,000 credits, Rey.”

Rey’s eyes nearly bugged out of her head. “Ten thousand? That could feed a whole village!” she exclaimed indignantly.

“Yes, Rey, by my calculations, you are correct. Would you like to trade in your clothes for trooper-grade material?”

“No,” Rey’s voice darkened. “Charge it to the Supreme Leader’s expense account.”

“Excellent! I am happy I was able to assist you in your endeavor. Charging 10,000 credits to Supreme Leader Ren.”

Rey smirked, satisfied with herself. Just because he gave her more privileges didn’t mean she would stop resisting in whatever way she could.

When the droid left, loneliness began to sink in. She stretched out on the couch, acutely aware of her muscles that were already starting to feel sore from her morning workout. She closed her eyes for a time and toyed with the idea of sleep, but she couldn’t shut her brain off. Her body longed to be touched, distracting her from whatever techniques she tried to fall asleep.

She felt uncomfortable with the idea of masturbating in Kylo’s room. For all she knew, he had cameras installed to ensure she didn’t escape. But the thought of his lips against her skin were pervasive. She grunted in frustration and her hand flirted with the waistband of her pants before she withdrew it. “No,” she commanded herself. Her cunt pulsed with urgency at the attention, beckoning her mind to replay the events with Kylo that morning. Almost unconsciously, she closed her eyes and focused on the sensation of his breath on her ear as he whispered, “Maybe I’ll get you a leash.”

She spread her hand and moved it slowly down her torso, imagining it was his. Her fingers pushed under her clothing and spread her lips wide. She exhaled a quiet gasp escaped when her fingertips brushed her clit. She was accustomed to masturbating every day before her capture, so the months-long incarceration heightened her sensitivity.

She brought her fingers to her mouth and wetted them with saliva before she ran her them through her lips, sticking one into her cunt on every few passes. She could smell her arousal as her body climbed closer to climax. She was close. But she hesitated, again remembering his threat. “Maybe I’ll get you a leash.” Her eyes rolled back as she pressed a finger to her clit before pulling her hand back. She hurriedly shoved off her pants and walked to the bedroom, searching for the restraints Kylo removed from her that morning while her cunt pulsed with an increasing need.

She saw them on the floor and hesitated, biting a fingernail. She had minimal experience with bondage but had always been morbidly curious. She just didn’t see herself as “that kind of girl.” But her body ached for release and she wanted to make up for lost time. She attached one set of cuffs to her ankles and tested them. They make a click as they caught, and a rush of juices escaped from her cunt. She breathed heavily and attached the last set of cuffs to her wrists, the metal cool and enticing.

She waddled her way back to the couch and laid down on her belly. She spread her knees wide, her ankles hanging in the air, and edged her hands down to her cunt. The bonds dug into her skin, but the pain was erotic somehow. She didn’t understand why it registered for her as pleasure and not pain, but she decided to go with the feeling. With her hands bound, it took her a few minutes to get properly adjusted, but finally, she settled into an easy rhythm. She rubbed her finger in a circular motion on her clit while her hips bucked wildly. Her breathing intensified as her body built towards its first climax in bondage and the couch stifled her moans. She was moments away from climax and Kylo was the only person on her mind. “Oh fuck, Ben,” she whined. “If only you knew what you did to me,” she moaned, her voice high-pitched. “Oh, ung, fuck, Ben!” she yelled as she climaxed hard into her hand.

She rolled onto her back, panting. “God dammit,” she said exasperated. “That was amazing.” She collected herself for a few minutes, savoring the relaxation that spread throughout her body. Sitting up on the couch, she stretched, and the shame of her orgasm kicked in. _I just masturbated to Ben, _she thought, cringing. “I need to get out of these,” she said standing up, ready to relegate her fantasies to the deepest depths of her mind. She tried to take a step forward, overestimating her range of movement in the restraints and tripped. She hit her head on the edge of the table, and a thin line of blood ran down her forehead. “Fuck!” she grunted.

She pushed herself up to her elbows and scanned the room. In the heat of the moment, she didn’t think to locate the mechanism to unlock the cuffs before she put them on. She tried to picture what he did with it when he removed them, but her mind came up blank. She carefully stood up and shuffled around the apartment. “It has to be somewhere,” she said panicking. The minutes ticked away and she couldn’t find it anywhere.

Finally, she grabbed a blanket from the wardrobe, covered herself on the couch, and turned on the holo screen. She didn’t have a plan, but she couldn’t let him see her restrained, even if it meant sitting on the couch for the next seven hours.

* * *

Kylo stalked back to his chambers. “Ten thousand fucking credits,” he muttered under his breath. “Who the fuck does she think she is?” He stormed into the room and twitched his nose. The air was thick with arousal and Rey’s heart was racing. “Hello, Rey,” he said amused, his anger momentarily forgotten. “What happened to your forehead?”

“Ben!” she exclaimed. “You’re back.” She tried to keep the awkwardness out of her voice, but that only made it sound more strained. “It was nothing, just me being clumsy.”

“It’s still bleeding,” he said concerned.

“I’m fine, really.” She needed him to stop asking questions. “How was your day?”

“It was fine until I found out you contacted command _and _charged ten thousand credits in my name,” he scorned, moving toward the couch.

“Don’t sit next to me,” she managed as he tried to sit down. She was worried he would feel the cuffs beneath the blanket.

He was more angered than he was hurt. “You don’t make the rules,” he sneered.

“Well, what do you expect when you come in here and yell at me?”

“So this is my fault now? You’re in-fucking-credible, Rey. You have no idea what this is doing to my reputation.”

“Gee, sorry I’m more concerned about my comfort than your ‘reputation,’” she mocked.

“You could’ve just asked me,” he yelled, throwing his mask against the wall with a loud thud.

Rey jumped involuntarily when the helmet hit the metal. “Calm down, Ben,” she said, keeping her voice level. Her breathing increased as his temper flared. Not only did she not have the force, but her limbs were totally restrained. If he wanted to hurt her, there was nothing she could do to protect herself.

“No, I won’t just calm down!” He breathed heavily; his eyes widened as he raged. “You don’t get to do this and not suffer any consequences.” A veil of darkness seemed to pull over him as he towered over her cowering form.

“Kylo, please. Please don’t hurt me,” she begged, her eyes beginning to water.

Kylo paused at the sound of his chosen name. Though it annoyed him that Rey refused to use it, ‘Ben’ was how she perceived him. But now she believed him to be the monster everyone else did.

He slumped down on the couch next to her. “I... I don’t know what to say,” he said, burying his face in his hands.

“What were you going to do to me?” Rey questioned. Her voice was barely a whisper.

“I don’t think I could hurt you.” His eyes pleaded with her. “Something just came over me.”

“Stop. You don’t get to threaten me and then claim you lost control. That was really fucking scary, Ben. I don’t have my powers.”

Kylo’s muscles released some when she used his given name. “You’re right,” he resigned. “I’m used to blaming everything on the dark side when really I act out because I know I have an excuse.”

Rey was surprised at his knack for introspection. It didn’t fit the stereotype of dark lord. “I forgive you, Ben. But I swear to god, if you ever speak to me like that again, I’ll find some way out of here.” There was an edge to her voice that made him believe her.

“Thanks,” he said and turned to face her. “So...” he continued awkwardly. “Where are your new clothes?”

“They’re in the bedroom,” she said plainly.

“Can I see them?” he asked.

“Sure, go ahead,” she said motioning toward the room with her head. She hoped he wouldn’t press any further so she could get a moment to stretch her arms and legs.

He was confused at her removal from the situation but blamed himself for his outburst. He walked into the bedroom to examine the clothes lining a rack. “You’ve got expensive tastes,” he laughed from the other room. “But good taste.” He poked his head around the corner and added, “For a scavenger.” His eyes widened and he stared at the metal cuffs linked around Rey’s outstretched ankles. “What the-”

“Eep!” Rey shrieked, yanking her ankles back under the blanket.

Kylo connected the dots between the smell of arousal and her heightened heart rate when he first entered the room. A wicked smile spread across his face and he casually moved toward her. “What else did you do today, Rey?”

“I, uh, exercised.”

“Mhm. What else?” He was kneeling in front of her.

She snapped her legs closed. “Nothing!” _He can’t find out, he can’t find out, _her mind raced.

“What can’t I find out?” he teased, taking his gloves off.

“You read my mind!” she cried.

“Only on the surface,” he said, sliding his hands beneath the blanket. His cock pulsed with need when his hands felt cool metal around her ankles. “My, my. You were very busy today my pet. Couldn’t find this?” he asked, pulling the unlocking device from his pocket.

Rey glared at him. “Unlock me now,” she commanded.

“I think I’d rather have some fun with you first.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smut ahead! Kylo begins training Rey to keep up appearances.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Knights of the Old Republic Easter egg if you played the game :)

Using the force, Kylo set down the device across the room and removed the blanket. He took in her pale nakedness, breathing in the scent of her arousal.

“No Ben,” she protested, feeling utterly helpless at the hands of a killer.

He looked up at her, pleading. “Rey, I’ve wanted to taste you for so long.” He sucked on her thigh, leaving a mark when he finally pulled away. “What will you do to stop me?” he challenged, thumbing the restraints.

Her words refused to come out. She felt a lust for him unlike anything she’d experienced before, and at the same time, he threatened her only minutes earlier. She let out a groan as he placed delicate kisses along her calf, then up her thigh, stopping to breath hot air on her cunt.

“Tell me you want me, Rey,” he commanded.

“Ben, stop,” she insisted, coming back to her senses. She attempted to pull away and close her legs, but it only increased his aggression.

“The more you struggle, the more it makes me want you,” he said, easily holding her legs open.

“No!” she cried, a single tear falling down her fear-contorted face.

Kylo immediately let her go, at last registering her resistance as genuine.

“Guess we need a safe word, huh?” he joked. “Sorry, I just assumed you were into it,” he added more seriously.

“You say that like you’ve done this before.” She wasn’t trying to pry, but he adjusted to the idea of her in restraints rather quickly.

He snorted a laugh and called the remote over to him, removing the restraints. “Do you want a drink?” he asked, moving to the bar. He tensed for an objection, but it never came.

“No thanks,” she grumbled. She wrapped the blanket around her and went to put on some comfortable sleep clothes, taking her hair down. She came back into the living room, shaking out her hair, and timidly asked, “Have you ever, you know. Done _that _before?”

He admired the simple beauty of Rey in the baggy clothes and settled onto the couch. “Yes.”

She was strangely disappointed to find out this wasn’t his first time, and it read blatantly on her face. “With how many people?”

He sighed and sipped his drink. “I don’t feel comfortable discussing numbers.”

“I don’t mean anything by it,” she said, sitting on the couch next to him, though with enough distance between them that they weren’t in danger of touching.

“I know you don’t, but if I tell you, both of us will feel dissatisfied. This is non-negotiable.”

“You’re probably right,” she resigned, awkwardly picking at a tag hanging off of a pillow.

“I guess you’re new to it, huh?”

“Yeah.” Her throat clenched and she swallowed hard. “Definitely new.”

Kylo smiled to himself, eager to guide her through the process. It was a different kind of sexiness than from someone who knew the ropes. “That’s okay. I can teach you,” he said, leaning over to gently kiss on the top of her head. “Let’s watch something.”

Rey didn’t know whether she should feel excited or nervous about her new education, and she nervously scooted a few more inches away from him.

He scrolled through the selection of movies and selected a light horror flick. “Is this okay?” he asked her.

“Yeah, I don’t mind. It seems a little obvious, though,” she laughed. “Are Sith lords allowed to watch anything but this?”

He leaned over and tickled her, and she tried unsuccessfully to get away, his physical strength holding her in place. “Kylo- Stop- I can’t... breathe!”

After a few more unbearable moments, he let up and their bodies were near one another. They made brief eye contact and Kylo pulled her in close, wrapping his arm around her. He sensed her heart beating rapidly, and his increased in time. He wasn’t used to intimate moments like this. Usually, his experiences with women were detached and ended after an orgasm. This was... nice.

Rey’s heart raced, despite all her efforts to calm down. _He’s too damn smooth_, she thought grumpily. She decided not to get comfortable to keep herself from enjoying being this close to him. But a jump-scare on screen caused her to lean into him and grab a fistful of his shirt.

Kylo smirked and pulled her closer. There was nothing like a horror movie to bring two people together.

Despite Rey’s best efforts, her body relaxed into him. He was so warm, and the subtle scent of cologne was intoxicating. Her eyes blinked heavily, and she yawned, close to sleep. _I won’t fall asleep next to him_, she affirmed. Within minutes, she was breathing deeply and nuzzled closer to him in her sleep. Kylo followed suit soon after.

LLLL

The next morning, Kylo broke the news to Rey over breakfast. “The twi’lek wants to speak with you,” he said cautiously.

“Do you have to refer to her as ‘the twi’lek?’ It’s so demeaning.”

“Fine, _Eyal’bibe _wants to speak with you,” he corrected, rolling his eyes.

“Why does she want to talk to me?” Rey asked.

“She wants you to do a public appearance proclaiming your loyalty to the Order.”

Rey’s eyebrows lifted in surprise. “You said I wouldn’t have to do it.” There was an edge to her voice, though she tried her best to remain calm.

“I know,” he said, placing a hand on hers across the table. He felt her senses spike in tandem with his own when their hands connected. “You won’t have to. It’s just for formality’s sake.”

“I don’t know, Ben,” she said, nervously tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

“You’ll be fine. I promise. We’ll figure out something. Just agree to it and we’ll find a reason to postpone.”

“Can’t you just fire her, almighty Supreme Leader?” Her voice dripped with sarcasm.

“Unfortunately, no. The Council’s watching me very closely, especially with how the events relating to you have unfolded. For now, she has to stay.”

Rey bit her lip, undecided.

“C’mon, do it for me,” he said, squeezing her hand.

She had a hard time saying no to his puppy dog eyes. “Fine,” she grumbled. Something about the woman frightened her, though she couldn’t say why. “Will you be there?” she asked suddenly.

“Of course, I will,” he promised. He was saddened by her need for him to protect her. If he would just take the collar off, she would be perfectly capable of handling her own. “On that note,” he continued, “I have other obligations to take care of today and won’t be on the ship.”

“Obligations like what?” She could sense trepidation in his speech.

“Um... An insurgence on an Order-controlled planet,” he said flinching.

Rey narrowed her eyes. “You already know what I have to say, so I won’t waste my breath.”

“On the bright side,” he said in an effort to change the conversation, “you get to leave the apartment today.”

Rey perked up, momentarily forgetting about the many lives that would be taken by Kylo’s hand later that day.

“I have to train you. Before you object, we have to keep up appearances. For now, we can get away with physical training exercises only since I know you won’t learn the force from me.”

“Actually, that sounds kinda nice. I could use a good sparring match after I’ve been cooped up for so long.”

He glowered at her from across the table. “Challenge accepted.”

LLLL

Kylo and Rey exited the apartment and were greeted by a squadron of stormtroopers. One stepped forward holding a length of cloth. “Turn around,” he said gruffly to Rey.

She cast an angry glance at Kylo as she followed the trooper’s instructions, though it was hard to admonish him when he wore the mask.

“There’s no need. She is my apprentice. Not my prisoner,” he said crisply. Without waiting for a reply, he pushed past the troopers and made for the elevator. _Please don’t make me regret that, Rey._

Rey took careful notice of her surroundings as they walked, though it was difficult to keep everything distinct in her memory because of how similar each section of the ship looked. Nevertheless, she tried her best. She felt guilty for mentally preparing for an escape, which is exactly why she didn’t want to do things like have sex or fall asleep in his arms. Even though she didn’t necessarily intend to betray him, if push came to shove, she would need every advantage she could get.

The training room was large enough to hold three rancors comfortably, and a large portion of the floor was lined by a glowing band of white light. Rey recognized it as the same tech used in the dueling rings on Jakku. If an opponent stepped on the line, it would glow red, signaling their defeat. Various sets of weapons and armor lined the walls, most of which were marked with the signs of battle.

“Impressed?” Kylo asked, handing his cloak to a nearby stormtrooper. _Why haven’t they left?_ he thought as they lined the wall standing at attention.

“It’s a few steps up from the dueling rings on Jakku, that’s for sure. I haven’t even seen half of these weapons,” she admired, moving toward them. Two stormtroopers raised their blasters in warning. She raised her hands and backed away slowly until they lowered their weapons. “Guess that means we’re doing hand-to-hand.”

“You could use some teaching on that anyway. You’re too reliant on your stick.”

“That _staff_ has done me plenty good,” she responded.

Kylo moved in swiftly with a quick jab to her ribs and flipped her on her back before she could react. “No staff, no chance,” he teased.

She grabbed his ankle and yanked as hard as she could. He lost his balance and she brought her foot to the back of his other knee, bringing him to the ground. “No chance, huh?” she said triumphantly, crouching in a defensive pose.

Kylo wished desperately that they were alone. He wanted to kiss her cheek when she was insolent like this. Her confidence and ability were irresistible. He got to his feet and saw several members of the Council enter the room. “Supreme Leader Ren,” General Swan said bowing. His closely cropped black hair accentuated his angular face in a disturbing way. “We are delighted to hear that you are ready to train your new apprentice. “May we stay and watch? I must admit, the Council is curious to witness firsthand a fight between the two most powerful people in the galaxy.”

Rey couldn’t help but notice that none of them acknowledged her. It was as if she wasn’t there.

Kylo gritted his teeth and nodded. _So that’s what the extra security’s about_, he thought. _This is about more than curiosity. _He removed his gloves and tossed them at a stormtrooper who came dangerously close to dropping them on the floor; Kylo had killed a man for less. He turned toward Rey and his demeanor shifted drastically. “You will kneel before me until I give you instruction to do otherwise.”

A chill ran down Rey’s spine and she hesitated.

Kylo reached out a hand, using his powers to force her to the ground.

She gasped as her knees hit the floor.

“You will do as I say, or you will die.” His voice sounded hollow, void of life.

Rey nodded weakly, staring at a spot on the floor.

“Look at me,” Kylo commanded, and his heart sank at the look of antipathy he saw in Rey’s eyes. He hated her to see this side of him, but he had no choice now that they were being watched. “The Sith are an ancient race long extinct, though a select few remember and follow their teachings. Only the most powerful are capable of wielding the power of the Sith.”

“What happened to them?” she asked, hoping it was acceptable for her to speak out of turn.

“They wiped one another out in their hunger for power. That is why there are only two now, you and me, and there will only ever be two Sith. And one day...” He trailed off, his throat catching. “One day you will kill me as I killed my master, and the cycle will continue.”

“Oh.” _No wonder he turned out this way_, she thought sadly.

“As Sith, we are unafraid of the power of the dark side. It’s what gives us strength.”

Rey glanced at the group of Council members and saw several nodding their heads along with Kylo’s lecture.

“Repeat after me, Rey, and I will impart on you the ancient wisdom of the Sith. Peace is a lie, there is only passion.”

“Peace is a lie, there is only passion.”

“Through passion, I gain strength. Through strength, I gain power.” His mechanical voice intoned the words he’d memorized many years ago.

“Through passion, I gain strength. Through strength, I gain power.”

“Through power, I gain victory. Through victory, my chains are broken.”

“Through power, I gain victory. Through victory, my chains are broken.” The words tasted like poison on her tongue.

“The force shall free me.”

“The force shall free me.” She had to admit the words were powerful as much as she detested them. A disgruntled young boy like Kylo was hopeless to resist such intoxicating rhetoric.

“Rise, my apprentice, and I will guide you on your path to the dark side.” There was a part of Kylo that imagined this was real, that their love allowed Rey to see clearly and agree to an apprenticeship. _We could be so powerful_, he thought forlornly, taking on an offensive stance. “Let us begin.”

They trained hard for about an hour, all the while under the watchful eye of the Council. For the most part, Rey could hardly land a punch. She didn’t realize how much she relied on the force to hone her senses, even subconsciously. Kylo knew he was being unfair, but he had to appear ruthless to the onlookers. The only bearable moments for both of them was when their hands touched, skin-against-skin, providing them with a window into the other’s mind. The light changed to red yet again as Rey landed hard on the ground for the umpteenth time after Kylo launched her through the air. Kylo resumed a neutral stance with his hands clasped behind his back, signaling the lesson was over. Rey climbed to her knee, kneeling before him, the now white light illuminating beads of sweat rolling down her face.

Kylo steeled himself for this next part. “You have much to learn, my apprentice. Perhaps I was wrong in thinking you worthy of the ways of the dark side.”

Tears stung her eyes. She knew this was part of the act, but she was sick of it. _Please let this be over soon, _she prayed, squeezing her eyes shut.

“Only time will tell. Do not disappoint me again,” he warned and walked over to the Council. “Dismissed,” he called disinterestedly over his shoulder.

Rey refused to show any weakness in front of the Council or the stormtroopers and stood tall. She wasn’t ready to go back to Kylo’s cramped apartment and she busied herself with stretches, hoping he would take his time.

“She has a lot to learn,” observed General Swan. His narrow, upturned eyes looked at her reprehensibly as she stretched on the floor.

“It’s clear she’s had little formal training,” Kylo agreed. “But that means there is little poor training to correct.” He waited impatiently for the conversation to end. Time was running out before his mission and he wanted to check in with Rey. He imagined that was a level of immersion that was difficult for her to ignore. Finally, the council members left and Kylo ordered the stormtroopers to follow.

When they were alone, Kylo approached her and removed the mask. “You took all that pretty well. I’m honestly impressed.”

“It doesn’t take much, obviously.” The tension of the training boldened her, and she stood on the tips of her toes to kiss him, lightly gripping his shirt for stability. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close.

“If they weren’t in here, that would’ve been a lot more fun,” he pouted.

“You’re telling me,” she huffed. “Do you actually believe that stuff?”

He bristled and set his jaw. “Yes. It’s what Snoke taught me and it’s my duty to pass on the Sith teachings.”

This was the problem they faced. Whether Kylo was indoctrinated or not was beside the point. What mattered was his unwillingness to move past it. Rather than argue the point, Rey held him tightly and rested her head on his chest. She heard his heart beat steadily and it eased her worries.

Kylo was awed by her willingness to be so close and hated that he had to leave. He took a step back and cupped her face in his hands. “I have to leave now, and I might not be back ‘til morning.”

“Can’t I go with you?” she asked, sounding hopeful.

“Even without the Council breathing down my neck, I wouldn’t risk it.” He kissed her forehead lightly. “It took too long to get you here and I’m not about to lose you.” He kissed the bridge of her nose. “I’ll miss you,” he said quietly, kissing the tip of her nose. “Will you miss me too?” he asked, kissing her once more on her perfectly formed lips.

“Yes,” she whimpered, closing her eyes and losing herself completely in his touch, his tongue exploring her mouth, sending waves of pleasure through her body. “Oh Ben,” she breathed, tangling her fingers into his hair.

He kissed her more urgently, slowly backing her up until she ran into a workbench against the wall. He used the force to clear it of any tools, sending them clattering to the floor. He pressed his erection against her thighs and groaned. “Fuck, Rey. I need to feel you.” He licked up from the base of her neck and nibbled on her earlobe, all the while rubbing his cock against her with increasing fervor.

Rey’s cunt gushed with need, and though she wanted to wait, the mounting pressure was too much. She parted her legs, so his cock rubbed directly on her clit. Even through her clothes, an orgasm was already mounting.

Kylo sensed this and traced her ear with his tongue, eliciting quiet moans from Rey. “I’m gonna mark you so everyone knows you’re mine,” he threatened breathily in her ear.

The hot air on her skin and what she knew were not empty threats sent a pulse of heat to her cunt, and she ground her hips hungrily into him.

He kissed down her neck and planted his hands on her ass, lifting her onto the workbench. He sucked on her neck, running his tongue against the skin, and left purple marks that he knew would last.

“Oh, Ben. Be- Careful. People will- Know...” Her sentence trailed off into moans as he bit her neck.

“You don’t tell me what to do,” he said, latching onto another part of her skin. His hands slid under her tunic and massaged her breasts, the feeling of her hard nipples in his palm bringing him close to climax. “Fuck it,” he growled and pushed himself on top of her on the workbench. “I want you, Rey,” he moaned, grinding his hips against hers.

She was intimidated by the outline of his cock beneath his black pants as it rubbed urgently against her. “Oh Ben,” she gasped.

“Call me Kylo.”

“No, I won’t-” Her breath caught as his hand wrapped around her throat.

“Call me Kylo,” he said again, his voice low.

Rey’s vision blurred and the restricted airflow intensified her arousal. “No,” she choked out with a smirk.

Kylo removed his hand and smacked her. “Do it,” he said, gripping her jaw. His eyes were intense as they bored into hers. “Say, ‘I want you, Kylo.’”

She wanted to bring a hand to soothe her cheek, but she kept her arms at her side, afraid of facing any more repercussions. “Fuck. I want you... Kylo,” she admitted in a daze.

Kylo grunted and ran his tongue deep into Rey’s mouth. “When you do as I say,” he paused to kiss her once more, “you get rewarded.” She bucked her hips into his and he gripped them midair, oblivious to everything except the beautiful woman beneath him.

“Ben, don’t stop,” she begged, but he slowed down to an agonizingly slow pace. “Please,” she whimpered. Her body pushed her beyond any point of reason as it neared release.

“Say my name and I’ll give you what you want.”

“Kylo, please don’t stop. I want you to make me cum.” Her voice rose in pitch with her desperation.

“That’s a good girl,” he whispered into her ear.

“B- Kylo, I’m gonna cum,” she shouted. “Oh. Fuck. I’m gonna-”

Kylo muffled her mouth with his hand to dampen her screams. “You need to be quiet, Rey.” When she nodded, eyes wide with hunger, he removed his hand. “Cum for me, baby,” he said, picking up the pace. “I wanna hear you cum for me.”

“Oh yes. Yes, Kylo, YES. FUCK.” She gripped his muscular arms as her body convulsed. “Oh, Kylo I’m cumming.”

“Yeah? Do you like how my cock feels?”

“Fuck yes, Ben. Kylo. Yes.”

Kylo had envisioned this before, but experiencing it now was beyond anything he could have imagined. “Oh shit, shit, ung!” he exclaimed, thrusting harder.

“Are you cumming?” Rey asked, her voice strained with her orgasm.

“Oh- ng- yeah.”

“Goddammit, Be- Kylo.” Rey’s orgasm peaked as they came together, grinding their hips until completion.

Kylo rolled off the workbench and pulled Rey toward him so her legs hung over the side, resting his hands on her hips. “You’re so beautiful,” he said, searching her face for some sort of reaction. She was unable to make eye contact. “What’s wrong?” _Did I misread her cues?_

She didn’t respond. Words could not express the turmoil inside her. She felt like a whore who so readily turned herself over to the enemy responsible for the near destruction of the Rebellion, for the death of many of her friends.

“I’m so sorry, Rey. I thought you...” He allowed his sentence to fade, afraid to breathe life into the words rattling around in his mind. He slid his hands from her hips and adjusted the cum-soaked waistband of his pants. “I don’t know what to say. I would never knowingly hurt you.”

“Goddammit, Ben, it isn’t about you,” she yelled.

“So, I didn’t force you to- “

“No! That’s the problem! You didn’t have to.” She crossed her arms and sat cross-legged, trying to make herself smaller.

Kylo felt immense relief at hearing he didn’t force her into what just happened. But with relief came the anxiety that she would never be able to love him fully, if at all. “I’m glad it happened,” he said resolutely. “First Order and Rebellion be damned, it felt right being so close to you.”

She bit her lip and stared at him. His earnestness was difficult to withstand. “I guesso,” she muttered noncommittally.

He lifted her chin and smiled warmly. “Pretend it’s just us. No war, no Sith or Jedi. Just you and me. How do you feel about what just happened?”

Much to her chagrin, a smile crept onto her face. “I...” She hesitated, afraid to finish the sentence, knowing that things could never go back to the way things were once she said it out loud. “If it were just us,” she took a steadying breath, “I could do this with you every day for the rest of my life.”

Kylo’s heart erupted into fireworks and he pulled her in for one, last passionate kiss before he left. “I have to leave soon, and I need to take care of this.” He gestured to his pants.

“I wish you didn’t have to go,” she said fearfully. “I hate being on this ship without you.”

“You’ll be fine,” he said, trying to reassure her. “I won’t be gone long.”

She got off the table and straightened her hair in the dull reflection of the workbench. She regretted allowing him to give her those hickeys as soon as she saw the bruising. “How am I supposed to hide these?”

He grabbed a cloak from a nearby set of armor and fastened it around her shoulders. “You look like a real Sith apprentice,” he remarked before putting the mask and gloves on. He held her hand as they walked to the doors and didn’t let go until the last second.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are a few inconsistencies here from the movie. For example, I'm not leaning into Kylo searching for Luke and in this version of events, everyone knows Kylo killed Snoke. From this point on, there may be more inconsistencies, but I recognize them. I am changing minor elements from the movies to suit the plot.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo leaves Rey alone on the ship but makes a special promise to return.

Back in the apartment, Rey stared out of the window lost in thought while Kylo suited up for the mission. When he emerged from the bedroom in his full battle regalia she couldn’t help but admire him. The dark grey shirt was more fitted than his usual wear and ran down to his wrists, and two emblems were affixed to the front of a black vest. The first was the symbol of the First Order, though it was red instead of the traditional black. She recognized it as the seal of the Supreme Leader. The one underneath was unfamiliar to Rey, but whisperings of the force passed through her mind when she looked at it. It was white in the center, and in four directions stretched a long orange spike, with two smaller spikes on either side. “That’s the emblem of the Sith,” she mumbled, confused as to how she knew that.

“The force is strong with you,” he replied with an awed expression. He shook his head and put on his dulled leather boots. “Behave yourself while I’m gone,” he said, making a show of place the remote on the table.

Rey was mortified and her face turned a dark shade of red.

He smiled, quickly moving towards her and scooped her into his arms. Rey let out a quiet shriek at the sudden loss of gravity and clung tightly to his neck. “I was thinking,” he said, carrying her over to the couch. He sat down and positioned her so she straddled him. “What if I cleared my schedule for a day? Maybe we could do something when I get back.”

“Something like what?” she asked breathless.

“Oh, I dunno. I’ve heard the beaches of Iloh are pretty nice this time of year. And their planetary cuisine is to die for.”

“You- You mean you’d let me off the ship?” Rey beamed, her eyes filled with hope.

“If you promise to behave while I’m gone,” he said, gripping her ass.

“So...” she began, afraid to ask the question. “Is this a date?”

Kylo laughed and pulled her forward so she could feel his cock pinned between his pants and his thigh. “Yes, a date.”

Rey was overwhelmed. An hour ago, she all but fucked the Supreme Leader and now she willingly agreed to go on a date with him. And she was over the moon about both. _Stockholm syndrome,_ she told herself. _It’s just Stockholm syndrome_. She kissed him hard, biting his bottom lip, unconsciously grinding her hips into his.

“Mmm,” he groaned. “Is that a yes then?”

“Yes,” Rey smiled shyly. It had been a long time since someone treated her to a proper first date, namely because the number of suitable candidates was remarkably limited on Jakku. She felt Kylo’s hands push her away gently, but she held on.

“I have to go, Rey,” he sighed. He was loathed to leave her in general, but especially because of her sexual forwardness. He was excited to test the waters with this side of Rey.

“I know,” she said grimacing, climbing off his lap. There was no point in trying to talk him out of the mission, but she felt a stinging recourse that she didn’t try. “Be careful,” she blurted out as he reached the door.

Kylo chuckled, but his eyes were lined with sorrow. “You don’t have to worry about me, little Rey.”

* * *

On his way to the docking bay, he saw Eyal’bibe saunter around the corner.

“Good afternoon, Supreme Leader Ren,” she greeted with a bow. “Fortune is in my favor today,” she continued, knowing he wouldn’t respond. “I was hoping I could speak with your apprentice while you are away.”

“I told you no one is to see her without me there,” he said gruffly.

“You do not have to worry, my Lord. I am highly skilled with a vibroblade,” she said, pulling the sword from the sheath on her back enough to show the blade. “Unless you are afraid for the girl,” she said, enunciating each word carefully.

“My apprentice can handle her own,” he growled. She’d hit a nerve.

“Of course, my Lord. I suppose I can wait until your return. I will just tell the Council we will further delay the press conference.”

Kylo let out a heavy sigh and glanced down the corridor; the troops were almost assembled. “Very well,” he agreed begrudgingly. While Eyal focused on the Order’s hold on the galaxy, he worried about his hold on the Council. If he put off Eyal’s discussion, the Council would see him as selfish and overprotective. And worse, they would see Rey as weak, making her more vulnerable than she already was.

“Perhaps I should tell her first,” he murmured to himself.

Eyal ignored this and held out two large flasks before him. “For the road,” she said with a wink.

Kylo took a drink as quickly as possible so none of the soldiers would see him without his helmet on. As much as he loved having Rey on the ship, it certainly had its drawbacks. “Shit,” he coughed, the alcohol burning his throat so his eyes watered.

“It is potent. I imagined a stronger drink would be more to your liking since you are leaving the ship.”

“You were right,” he said huskily, his throat still on fire. _Shit, I wish I had a chaser_. “Keep me updated on your meeting through our private line,” he commanded.”

Kylo pocketed his flasks and watched her disappear down the hall. _Clear your mind and invite in the rage_, he thought as he walked toward the docking bay securing his helmet. _And pray Rey will forgive me for the slaughter._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for such a short chapter and such a cliff hanger! Halloween demands most of my attention and creative faculties.
> 
> Update! I have the next 2-3 chapters written down on paper. The typing and editing process take some time, but this isn't a dead story. I'll upload them soon! 😘


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey is alone for the first time as Kylo flys off to battle, and Eyal'bibe comes to speak with her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update. Life is hectic and editing takes so long! This is a long one, though, so I hope that makes up for it. I have the next two chapters and a half written on notebook paper, so don't worry! This story isn't dead :)

Rey paced the small apartment, dreading the unknown number of hours Kylo would be gone. She regretted that she didn’t ask for some way to listen in on his progress, though, she supposed, it was probably for the best that she stayed as far removed from the battle as possible. _What if he’s fighting Finn? Or Poe? Or Rose? _“I can’t think like that,” she said shaking her head.

Her heart nearly burst out of her chest when the doors opened behind her with a hiss. “Ben?” she called, hopeful that he called off the attack. Her face fell when she saw his political advisor enter the room instead. “What do you want?” Rey sneered. She hadn’t meant to come off so harshly, but even with her dulled force senses, she suspected the twi’lek’s sudden appearance wasn’t good.

“Hello Rey,” Eyal spoke gently. She moved lazily into the room, toying with a figure perched on a shelf. “I am happy to speak with you under better circumstances.”

“I have nothing to say to you,” Rey spat through gritted teeth. Her body tensed defensively when she registered the vibroblade strapped across her back.

“Oh, Rey,” Eyal said, clicking her tongue. Her wide eyes were warm as she rested a hand on Rey’s face. “You do not have to speak if you do not wish.”

Rey took a step back to remove the woman’s hold. “Then why are you here?”

“I am here to talk, but if you do not wish to talk then there is nothing I can do.”

“You mean you’re not going to torture me if I say no?” Rey asked eyeing her suspiciously.

Eyal laughed and touched her arm, sliding her hand down to meet Rey’s. She squeezed her hand lightly and winked, leading her to the couch.

Rey’s feet moved for her, acting against her better judgment to pull her hand away and run.

“If you do not wish to speak, then let us have a drink. We will toast to your new apprenticeship.”

“I’m not a fan of drinking.” Rey was being unnecessarily stubborn but refused to let her guard down.

“But you look so stressed. Surely the Supreme Leader is not working you so hard so soon?” she soothed. “Come,” she said with a wink. “It will be a long night for you if you do not find a way to relax. I will make you a drink and rub your body.”

Rey’s throat constricted. “Ex- Excuse me?”

Eyal laughed knowingly. “Oh, forgive me. There are still phrases in Common that give me trouble,” she said as she moved to make them drinks. “You are sore, no? So, I will rub your sore muscles.”

“I think you mean a massage,” Rey choked out. She suddenly found herself very warm and removed the outer part of her clothing, revealing a modest, but form-fitted shirt underneath.

“Yes! How silly of me. So, you will have a drink, then?”

“Fine,” Rey surrendered. She was entranced by the way Eyal’s hips swayed as she moved, with her supple skin, and her eyes hungrily trailed her figure from top to bottom. Rey supposed some of her compliance was due to Eyal’s resemblance to an ex-girlfriend on Jakku, and she also surmised that Eyal wouldn’t take no for an answer. _Better to get it over with_, she thought.

Eyal turned around in time to catch Rey taking in her body but pretended not to see. “Here you are,” she said sitting down next to Rey, their knees brushing. “Let us toast. To the Order, to your apprenticeship, and to new friends.” Eyal delicately tapped Rey’s glass and took a drink.

Rey followed begrudgingly and took a cautious sip of the green liquid. “Wow, that’s actually pretty good!”

“When you have served politicians for as long as I, you learn how to make a good drink.”

Rey glared at Eyal and slammed her drink on the table, sloshing drops of green over the side. “You’re just trying to get me drunk so I’ll talk to you!” she accused.

Eyal’s laugh was buoyant, entirely disarming, if not patronizing. “Rey, you would only tell the Supreme Leader when he returns, so what would be the point in that? Regardless, getting you to drunkenly agree to a press conference would not work since you would simply refuse when you were sober again. I came here for business, but I stay for the company.”

Rey hated to admit it, but the woman was right. Yet the nagging suspicion refused to go away. _It’s probably just because she reminds me of Tali, _she laughed to herself.

“What amuses you?”

“Nothing,” Rey said, her cheeks flushed. She picked up the glass and took another nervous sip and then a hearty gulp. “So-”

“Turn around and I will rub your body,” Eyal interrupted. She relished at the panic in Rey’s eyes and corrected herself, “Massage.”

“Really, I’m so fine though. No muscle soreness here and –” Her breath caught as Eyal’s hands wrapped around her waist and forcefully turned her around.

“That is much better,” she breathed into Rey’s ear. “You must not forget your drink, young Rey.” Eyal grasped Rey’s hand and brought it to her mouth, all but forcing her to take a drink. “Mmm, you are so well-behaved, Rey.” But before Rey could protest, Eyal massaged her fingers into her shoulders.

Rey cleared her throat and attempted to speak coherently. “You say you’ve been in politics a long time. Who have you worked for?”

“Many names and many faces. Sometimes the name belongs to the face, but most often it does not.”

“Right.” _Whatever that means_. A troubling mixture of arousal and discomfort bubbled inside of her, but she felt incapable of protesting. Though Eyal hadn’t said a cross word, she held an unmistakable air of menacing control.

“Do I remind you of someone?” Eyal asked.

“No! Why would you?” she squeaked nervously.

“Working with politicians has also given me the ability to tell when someone is lying.” She moved her hands down Rey’s back, kneading with intensity.

Rey was terrified at the heat building in her cunt as Eyal’s hands moved lower. “You know, I’m not so sure about this massage,” Rey protested, her throat bone dry. She attempted to move away, but Eyal’s strong hands held her back.

“Who do I remind you of, Rey?” she asked huskily.

Rey took a few hurried sips, the helplessness of her situation settling in. “Um... My ex-girlfriend.”

“Oh! Who would have known?” Eyal wrapped her arms around Rey from behind and began rubbing her thighs.

Rey lost her breath when she felt Eyal’s breasts press into her back.

“Finish your drink,” Eyal instructed, her deft fingers working their way up Rey’s inner thighs.

Unsure of what drove her to acquiesce, Rey chugged the remainder of her drink obediently. Eyal’s hands inched closer to Rey’s cunt, her thighs parting subconsciously, eliciting a small moan of pleasure that escaped from Rey’s lips. “Wait,” she said, shaking her head. “No.” Rey tried to push Eyal’s hands back, but her arms were heavy. Eyal released her hold on Rey and watched her struggle with amusement. Suddenly, the glass felt heavy in her hand and it slipped from her fingers, shattering loudly on the floor. Rey blinked, noticing how hard it was to keep her eyes open. “What the fuck?” Her words sounded distant, like echoes in a cave. “What did you do... to me?”

Eyal turned Rey’s head and pushed her tongue between lips that parted too easily. “I am going to enjoy the look on your boyfriend’s face when I tell him General Swan gave you to the Hutts after you tried to escape.”

“N- No!” Rey stammered, willing her body to move.

“Do you know how much you are worth? How many people want a piece of you?” Eyal gently caressed Rey’s head like she was an animal with an expensive coat.

Rey’s mind swam with static. “Piece?”

“If you are lucky, you will be killed. But there are other buyers like me who likely have many creative ways to make use of you.” Eyal laid Rey flat on her back and straddled her, placing her hands on either side of her face.

Rey flinched as Eyal’s bracelets clinked beside her ear, their quiet purple glow invading her clouded vision. “Ben will... Ben will kill you,” she slurred.

“He will never know of my involvement. I do not take risks unless they are well-calculated. And I have done my research on you.”

“Collar... Off... Kill you...”

“It is too bad that you will not get the chance to remove the collar. How does it feel knowing you will be a slave for the remainder of your miserable existence? Does it make you angry? Although I suppose it is not much different from your existence here.” She shook out the buns in Rey’s hair and ran her fingers through. “Mmm, so soft. You will make someone very happy. But perhaps you can make me happy first.”

“Tell Ben... Collar off... Tell Ben...”

Eyal leaned in close. “If you ever tell him about this, I can promise you two things. The first is that I will kill you. For as long as I am alive, you will never sleep for fear that I will be waiting for my moment to strike. Believe me, I am very good at what I do.”

“Kill you... He will.”

“To kill me he must find me, and I am excellent at disappearing.” She planted a sweet kiss on her cheek. “The second is that I will tell him how much you wanted this,” she said kissing her again.

“No,” she said into Eyal’s lips. “I don’t...want this.”

Eyal smirked and worked her hand into Rey’s pants. “It matters not. He will always have that doubt. Now tell me, what about me most reminds you of Tali?”

“Ung!” Rey grunted in surprise as she felt her fingers caress her folds. _She knows... From Jakku..._

“Is it my lips?” she asked, roughly kissing Rey. “Or my ass? I saw you staring at it earlier.” She grabbed Rey’s wrist with her free hand and brought it to her ass. “I like it when you touch me, Rey. The more you touch, the more there is for me to tell.”

“Ngh...”

“What was that? I cannot understand you when you mumble,” she said snarkily.

“No!” Rey yelled as loud as she could, kicking Eyal in the stomach with the little remaining control she still had over her body.

Eyal doubled over on the ground, both hands gripping her stomach as she heaved for air. “You bastard,” she groaned shakily.

Rey counted herself lucky for getting in a good strike, but she still had nowhere to run. She wracked her brain to recall some crucial detail, a hidden weapon or secret exit, but she stood helpless, swaying back and forth. “Shit,” she muttered as she watched Eyal withdraw the vibroblade from her back.

“Dead or alive,” she grunted as she stepped forward. “I gave you a choice.”

_Comm..._ Rey thought finally. If she could just find a way past her.

Without warning, Eyal lunged forward, giving Rey only seconds to dodge. Her mind fogged, she overcorrected and crashed to the floor, a jarring pain stealing through her shoulder. _Comm... Just need... The comm...._

Eyal raised the sword high above her head, readying her strike. They locked eyes and Eyal’s face wore a sinister grin. She brought the blade down without mercy, intending to split her head clean open. Rey closed her eyes and prepared for the blow, but a loud explosion sent tremors through the deck. The blade landed with a dull thud on the metal floor just inches away from her head.

“Rah!” Eyal screamed, bringing her sword about for a final attack, but another explosion wracked the ship, sending Eyal toppling to the ground in a heap.

Rey blinked against the drowsiness that threatened to consume her. “Eyal?” she asked weakly. She crawled forward and saw the twi’lek unconscious on the floor. A line of blood contrasted sharply against blue skin as it trailed its way down her lekku. Rey reached a hesitant hand out for the hilt of the sword that lay limp in Eyal’s hand.

The hilt provided an anchor for her wandering mind, tethering her to consciousness. Rey pressed the end of the blade to the ground to steady herself, wobbling into a crouch. Her head pounded with a piercing noise, ceaseless and shrill. Only... She took a moment to breathe and registered what must be the ship’s alarm system. _We were... attacked_, she realized. _They... they were... attacked._ She heard another explosion, more distant this time, and roused her brain into a panic. _Attack... Not safe. Have to get... out. Comm... Comm is out. _

She clumsily made her way over to the comm and tried to speak coherently. “Hul- hullo? This is... Um... Rey.”

“What the bloody hell do you want? We’re under attack!”

“I can... help. Lemme help.” Rey gripped the edges of the console for stability. “Lemme out ‘n’ I’ll help.” The phrase came out as one rushed word. Eyal’s threats sounded in her mind so that she was too afraid to ask for help.

“We have things- Shit! -under control here. Our orders are to keep you locked up until the Supreme Leader returns.”

“Fuck!” Rey yelled, pushing herself from the console. Desperately, she tried various codes on the keypad next to the door to no avail. Explosions wracked the base with increasing intensity, and she chided herself for accepting the drink. “Fuckin’ shtupid.” She turned her head at the sounds of a rousing Eyal’bibe. Before she reached full consciousness, Rey dragged her body to the bathroom and ran a set of cuffs through an exposed pipe on the sink. She had barely clicked the set of restraints onto her ankles when Eyal fully regained her senses and spat in her face. “Dirty fucking scavenger!” she screeched.

Rey ignored the stream of obscenities from Eyal, allowing them to fade into the background of her mind along with the alarm and explosions. She experienced a strange sense of calm as she examined the living room. _Collar_, she thought weakly tugging at it. _Escape. _She opened Eyal’s bag and emptied it of its contents. Among mostly useless items, she found 250 credits, a medpac, and Eyal’s encrypted holotablet. “Dammit,” she whispered, hoping to find tools instead. She used the medpac on herself, hoping it would diminish the effects of the drugs. She sat against a wall, the cold metal cooling her body. _So hot,_ she thought. She closed her eyes and waited for the medpac to take effect. There was some relief, her mind less fogged. She felt so comfortable with her eyes closed. Colorful patterns danced before her eyes and her breathing slowed. _So warm..._ Her body seemed to melt into the floor, growing heavy. _So tired..._

BANG! Rey jolted awake in horror as a fighter pilot smashed into the bedroom wall, all but bursting through the reinforced glass entirely. The ship fell away and left cracks spreading steadily like a string of webs.

“Get up! Fuck you, get up!” Eyal screamed from the bathroom, just within eyesight of Rey. She pulled the cuffs against the pipes in a desperate attempt to break free. “I am not going to be sucked into space because you fucking fell asleep!”

Rey’s head pounded and she was ready to snap. She glared at Eyal and that’s when she noticed them: the bracelets rattling on her wrist in her struggle. Rey lumbered over to her captive, removed the bracelets, and resumed her escape attempt with renewed hope. She fit as many of her new clothes as she could into Eyal’s empty bag and added the credits and tablet. Even in her altered state, the instincts that were so central to her life on Jakku broke through the fog enough to prepare for the unknown ahead.

“What the fuck do you think you are doing? That is my fucking tablet! Rey!”

“I hope you... die... onthiship,” she said with eerie calmness before closing the bathroom door. As a last-minute thought, Rey grabbed the electronic key to the cuffs and slipped it in her bag. “Fuck her,” she said with a shudder.

The medpac had cleared her mind enough to formulate a plan. “One thing... left. Collar...” She snapped open the larger of the two bracelets, the purple light abruptly extinguished, exposing the various wires inside. She hoped the tiny parts were small enough to access the electrical framework of the collar. After some careful fiddling, she had a makeshift splicer. It was rough, but she didn’t have time to proof it for safety; a safe splicer wouldn’t do her much good if she was blasted into space. She felt horizontally along the collar and stopped when she touched a seam, moving her fingers vertically until they ran over a small hole.

Delicately, she brought a thin metal rod and shifted it across the surface of the collar searching for the hole. “Dammit,” she muttered through gritted teeth. Her body hummed with frustration. “So close...” She was to the point of tears, hyperventilating at the infuriating guessing game. “Fuck!” she screamed when she finally felt the metal slide into the hole. A small panel opened with a click and she brought the splicer to the collar. It would either short circuit the collar, causing it to release, or it would electrocute her. She took a deep breath and pressed the splicer to the exposed circuitry. The panel erupted in a shower of sparks and the collar dropped heavily to the floor.

Rey nearly lost her footing as she felt her connection to the force flow unobstructed. She drew on its power to lessen the effects of the toxin, gaining greater clarity and mobility. She donned the cloak from the training room to cover the bag and the vibroblade and approached the keypad by the door. She counted on the lie of her turn to the dark side to grant her safe passage, and a backpack and vibroblade were sure to give her away. After several failed tries with the splicer, Rey heard a strained hum and the doors opened. Her stomach twisted into knots and she felt a pang in her heart as she stepped into the corridor.

“Freedom.”


	15. Update

Hi everyone! Sorry for the fake update. Like has been crazy! From being sick to family drama to finals to the holidays, I haven't posted in a while. BUT! I'll have a new chapter up in the next couple of days 😁 I'm on Christmas break so I'm hoping to wrap up the story before I go back to school. Happy holidays to those who celebrate!

PS Who saw Rise of Skywalker? It was so good! 😱😱😱

PPS The next few chapters will be mostly plot. It's kind of impossible to include a sex scene during an escape without it seeming contrived lol. I promise there will be more smut to come! Including a new pairing ;) So if you're just in it for the smut, stay tuned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Promise this story isn't dead 😂


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey must escape the ship with little more than a prayer

Rey stepped outside to an empty corridor that was eerily still, save for the flashing red emergency lights. She took a moment to hone her senses, utilizing her newly restored force powers to jog her memory. She could see it clearly, the path to the training room she had taken only hours before. Every turn down an unfamiliar corridor revealed itself with acute clarity.

“God I’ve missed you,” she said gratefully. She never knew how much she relied on her connection to the force until it was stripped from her. With a determined look, she headed for the next phase – the only phase – of her plan. She knew three things: the training room held weapons, the training room wasn’t Kylo’s room, and she had no other leads. Occasionally, she ran into squadrons of stormtroopers rushing off to various parts of the ship, but none of them paid her any mind. _This is too easy_, she thought skeptically. _Then again, how would anyone know I escaped if Eyal’s still locked up?_

She forced the thought from her mind to stay focused and approached the training room slowly, praying it was empty. She poked her head through the door and, seeing no one, darted into the room. She had her eyes on a small blaster pistol nearest her, hoping to avoid any combat close enough to warrant the use of the vibroblade. Distracted by her haste and the lingering effects of the drugs, her foot caught on something out of sight. The vibroblade skittered across the floor and she landed hard on her knees.

“Well, well, well. If it isn’t the Supreme Leader’s little _science _experiment.”

Rey froze in place as she heard footsteps draw nearer, “Hux.”

“You remember me. How quaint.”

“I couldn’t forget the voice of Ben’s pet weasel,” she spat, scrambling for the vibroblade only a few feet away.

“Not so fast,” Hux warned.

Rey turned around begrudgingly to a blaster pointed at her face.

“You’ve made my job easier. Proving Kylo a fool for trusting in his own inept abilities. I’ll capture you and the Council’s allegiance will shift to me!” he exclaimed with a clenched fist.

Rey rolled her eyes in annoyance. “Are secret plots a requirement for membership of the First Order? It’s a bit much, don’t you think?”

“You would do wisely to hold your tongue, girl,” he sneered. “Your precious Kylo has a bit of a history I doubt he’s divulged to you. I’m not plotting for personal gain, I’m plotting for revenge.”

“What are you talking about?” She hoped to keep him talking to buy herself some extra time to think.

“We were lovers once.”

Rey couldn’t hide her surprise, her mouth agape.

“And now we’re not,” he said. “I didn’t think he would tell you.” His lips pressed into a thin line. “Kylo can go to hell, and I’ll be the one to send him there.”

“I guess we both have a reason to hate him then,” she said. “If I come with you, do you promise I won’t be harmed? We both have something to gain here.” Surprised, Hux nodded in agreement. “Alright then. But get that out of my face,” she added, nodding toward the blaster in his hands.

“How stupid do you think I am, girl?”

“It’s not like I’m able to put up much of a fight without my force powers,” she lied. The cloak concealed her bare neck, so she gambled on his gullibility.

“Ha! Rey, I like you. Perhaps we could’ve been friends in another life.”

“Hardly,” she hissed.

“Come now. I have an empire to take over and you have a heart to break.” He turned his back to her momentarily as he called into the hallway for the stormtroopers to detain her.

_Big mistake. _Rey called the vibroblade to her with the force and leaped at Hux. Before he realized what had happened, Rey knocked the hilt to his skull. Hux fell into a heap on the ground, but the damage was already done.

Five stormtroopers jogged into the room and immediately readied their weapons. Their leader, marked as such with full silver-plated armor, spoke in a commanding voice. “Freeze, Jedi scum. Don’t move or I’ll give the order.”

Rey froze but stood poised to fight.

Phasma brought her wrist to her helmet to speak into a communicator. “General Sawn, this is Captain Phasma. We’ve found the Jedi girl.”

Rey gritted her teeth and adjusted her stance, her feet planted firmly in the ground. “Stop. Calling. Me. Girl!” She used the force to hurl a weighty table toward Phasma and pinned her against the wall. Her head hung limp to the side, leaving only the four remaining troopers.

“Captain Phasma! Captain Phasma answer me immediately! What do you mean you _found _her?” General Swan called over the downed Phasma’s comm.

The remaining troopers opened fire and moved to close ranks. Rey caught a blaster hit to the arm and screamed out in pained, scrambling behind a table for cover.

“Shit. They’re supposed to have terrible aim!” she said in a panic. She reached her hand above the table and patted around until she felt a cold, metal cylinder. “Gotcha,” she said and pulled the weapon down.

She readied the blaster rifle, popped up, and reigned a flurry of shots at the troopers in random arcs, halting their progress forward. The weapon handled worse than she had anticipated, so she hardly managed to land a shot. But before she ducked down again for cover, she heard one of the troopers let out a shout. He dropped his blaster and wrapped his arms around his stomach and fell over lamely.

_Think Rey. You need to get out of here now,_ she thought. A slight movement on the edge of her vision caught her eye as the ship trembled from another attack. She reached her hand out to call the wobbling plasma grenade to her. She ditched the blaster rifle and launched the grenade toward her enemies, guiding it into a graceful arc so it landed equidistant between them.

“Grenade!” one yelled as he tried to leap to safety, but the explosive rooted him in place along with his comrades.

The force of the blast knocked the blasters out of two of their hands, eliminating them as a threat until the plasma wore off. _One left_, she counted as she peeked around the table. “Gotta find a blaster pistol,” she muttered, patting around the top of the table once more. After two failed attempts, she finally pulled it down. The plasma would soon wear off, she knew, and she would lose her chance. “It has to be now.” She gripped the blaster pistol so tight her knuckles were white and secured the vibroblade in its sheath with her other hand. She closed her eyes. “For the Resistance,” she whispered and took a deep centering breath.

Rey screamed and leaped from her cover. She charged for the door, scattering blaster fire into the immobile squadron. She felt an unfamiliar sensation beckon her forward and her pace hastened beyond that of any human. In the blink of an eye, she was standing in the hall beyond the room unharmed. She shot the door panel for good measure and locked them in the room.

She assumed that, by now, General Swan had alerted the base of her escape, so she ducked into the nearest empty room to formulate the next part of her haphazard plan. She entered a dark compartment lighted only by random access panels glowing red and blue. “Stupid, stupid, stupid!” she yelled, sliding her back down the wall to sit. She glanced at her wounded arm and grimaced; it didn’t look good and she’d already used the last of Eyal’s medpac. “You’re never getting out of here.” She blinked back tears, too exhausted to cry. “The Resistance is here for me and I can’t even manage to escape.” She hung her head low between her knees and considered giving herself up.

Then, a small figure slowly emerged from behind a stack of plasteel crates.

Rey held up her blaster pistol, ready to fire. “Show yourself or I’ll shoot,” she warned.

The figure responded with a flurry of excited beeps and rolled towards her.

“BB-8!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My brother thinks Kylo and Hux were lovers before the films take place and that's why they're so petty xD I couldn't resist making that canon in my universe! 
> 
> Also, posting a shorter version of this chapter so I can get them out faster. The next part should be out tomorrow or the day after (it's written but not typed/edited yet)
> 
> Do you all prefer one longer chapter that takes longer to edit and post or shorter chapters that I can turn around faster?


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tensions rise as Rey tries to escape the ship, but with the help of trusty friend BB-8, she has renewed hope.

BB-8 spun around in circles, whirring affectionately.

“Oh my god! BB-8 I can’t believe it’s really you!” she said, pulling him into a hug. “It’s the Resistance, right? They’re the ones attacking the ship?”

He nodded affirmatively.

“Then we need to hurry. They know I’ve escaped.”

BB-8 responded more slowly this time.

“Well, no. I wasn’t in a cell.” The droid continued his line of questioning, and Rey fidgeted with her hands nervously. “Listen, BB-8. You can’t tell anyone I was in his private quarters. This is very important. Can you do that for me?”

BB-8 hesitated before responding.

“Everything you do is against your programming,” she huffed in annoyance. “You mean to tell me you draw the line at lying to Poe? He’s my best friend! If I can lie to him then you can too.”

BB-8 simply turned around and rolled toward a control panel of flashing lights.

“Oh, very mature,” she grumbled.

He reached out a mechanical arm and plugged into the main computer system.

“Can you find us a way out?”

BB-8 whirred confidently, unplugging to project a holomap of the ship. He highlighted the fastest path to the hangar bay, and Rey studied it intensely. “It’s not too far from here. Thankfully we’re on the right level.”

BB-8 beeped his agreement.

"Thanks BB-8,” she said smiling. Hope had returned. BB-8 beeped again and her face lit up. “They’re waiting for us in the hangar bay?”

BB-8 nodded his head, chirping a response.

“Damn. That doesn’t give us much time then, does it?” she observed. “Wait, what are those triangles?” she asked in alarm, pointing to the map.

Her stomach dropped at his response. “I can’t take on the Elite Guard with a god damn blaster pistol and a vibroblade,” she assessed accurately. She’d barely made it out alive the last time she faced them, and that was with a Sith Lord and a lightsaber.

BB-8 chimed a suggestion.

“No, that won’t work. They’ll see me with you and know who I am right away, even dressed as a stormtrooper. Besides,” she said, patting the backpack. “We need this tablet and it’s just as conspicuous outside of the pack. At least if it’s in here I have an extra hand.”

BB-8 beeped excitedly, already rolling toward the control panel with his arm out.

“Good idea. If we’re lucky, no one will notice with the chaos of the Resistance attack.” The pair contacted the surrounding units and sent them in various directions, all of which led away from their route. She was doubtful that the Elite Guard would be fooled so easily, but it would at least eliminate resistance from the stormtroopers. It was the best chance they had.

Rey removed the cloak and folded it into the backpack. There was no need for secrecy now that the entire base was on alert, and she was unfamiliar with fighting with a cloak on; all that extra fabric got in the way. Still, she didn’t want to leave it behind. She felt silly for being so attached to the garment, but she didn’t know if she would ever see Kylo again. The clothes he gave her was all she had left of him and she wasn’t going to let them go.

BB-8 chirped a warning, urging her to move out before their enemies realized their deception.

Rey nodded and stepped up to the door. “You ready?” She said this more for her benefit than the droid’s. He spun his body around once and rolled forward. She pressed her hand to the panel and the door opened to an empty hallway. Cautiously, they stepped out of the room and headed to the right.

So far, their plan had worked; they were alone as they stole through the ship. Rey practically ran despite her fatigue, too terrified to relent. She kept catching glimpses of a shadowy Eyal’bibe from the edges of her field of vision, always angry, laughing, lustful. Her mind was at its breaking point.

“BB-8… How much further?”

The droid responded with concern in his robotic voice.

“If we’re that close, we can’t stop. I can make it.”

BB-8 sounded his disagreement but followed her lead. Before long, he rolled to a stop and quietly beeped as they at last reached a long corridor framed with immense windows on its left side. Through the window, Rey saw blaster fire moving between grounded tie-fighters, the sounds muffled through the thick glass panels separating them. “The hangar bay,” she breathed to BB-8.

BB-8 approached the large blast door that sealed shut under the ship’s emergency protocol. He extended a small arm and set to work on the controls to override the lockdown. Rey readied her blaster and stood on alert. She was convinced she’d see Eyal’bibe stalk down the long corridor and blinked away the perspiration dripping into her eyes. “Hurry up, BB-8. We don’t have much time.”

Movement at the end of either corridor caught Rey’s attention. “Shit.” From the right came Kylo’s Elite Guard clad in monochrome red, weapons drawn with crackling purple energy. From the other side were Hux and Captain Phasma closely followed by a dozen stormtroopers. “Any time now,” she urged a panicked BB-8. She reached for the vibroblade.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” Hux called. “Call off the droid and put your hands up or he gets a blaster shot right through his memory core.”

“Goddammit. How much longer?”

The droid beeped frantically.

“Okay, I’ll try to hold them off.” Rey raised her hands above her head to buy them some time. “You caught us. There’s no need to harm the droid.” The Guard drew nearer, and the sound of a crackling weapon made her flinch.

“Call him off or I order the shot,” he threatened again, a finger poised in the air.

“If you shoot him, you lose any intel he holds on the Resistance.” Hux was silent for a moment so she continued. “BB units are unique. They store data throughout their body. If you destroy any part of him, you risk corrupting critical information.”

Hux turned to consult with Phasma, presumably to corroborate her story. Phasma nodded and he directed his attention back to Rey.

The Guard was close now, almost within striking distance and she sweat freely. Somehow, she’d expected their escape to go much smoother, aided by the force in ways she couldn’t understand. She inched her hand toward the sheath, ready to defend both their lives to the death.

The guards’ weapons hummed with a bright energy that cast a strange light on their reflective armor. Rey swallowed hard against a dry throat as Hux shouted a command. “I want the droid intact! You can kill the girl.” Rey caught a quick glance of his face contorted with venomous hatred, and then the corridor was awake with a flurry of activity. The guards’ movements were heavy and erratic, but they moved with the elegance of a choreographed dance. Rey readied the vibroblade to stave off the first blow from a guardsman nearest her and kicked another before its weapon could knock BB-8 away from the door.

All she could manage was to dodge their attacks and keep herself between them and BB-8. She just needed to survive long enough for him to open the blast doors. She couldn’t win the fight, but she could outrun them. Less than a minute after the attack began, the blast doors opened. Rey had just managed to dodge a coordinated attack and called out to BB-8. “C’mon!” she yelled charging toward hope.

The pair rushed into the bay amidst the chaos of the firefight. Rey called on the force once again to give her haste as she scanned the area for the Millennium Falcon.

“Rey!” she heard a familiar voice call across the bay.

“Finn!” she shouted back, her voice strained. Her eyes landed on the ship, and she choked out a relieved sob.

“I’ll give you cover fire! We’ve gotta get outta here!” he yelled, firing a series of rapid shots.

“Don’t let the Jedi escape!” Hux screeched, his face red and temples bulging.

Rey sprinted as fast as her legs could go, willing the force to give her speed where her body couldn’t. She ran a serpentine pattern to avoid fire, though she was already an impossible target for the inept foot soldiers. She dove for the walkway of the Falcon, now lifting off the ground in preparation for a hasty retreat. As Finn’s hands clasped around her arms, she felt an immense pain. An Elite guard wrapped their weapon around her leg. “Finn!” she screamed desperately, eyes wide with dismay. She had come this far only to be captured at the last minute. She would kill herself before she let that happen.

Finn grasped her arms tightly so she stayed on the platform, but it was a losing battle. The longer he held her, the greater the damage. He took a blaster shot to his shoulder and nearly lost her. “Poe get out here!” he yelled, grunting as he tightened his grip. The remainder of the Guard was closing ranks, followed closely by Hux and Phasma’s soldiers. Time was running out.

Rey felt as if her leg were being ripped from her. The barbed edges of the flexible blade refused to loosen their grip without mottling the skin underneath. Small waves of electric shocks coursed through her. “Finn,” she sobbed, the pain too great to bear. She could hear the guards approaching and started to plan her suicide should the Falcon leave without her.

Then, Poe appeared at the top of the walkway and fired a shot at the guard. It landed with a sizzle on their helmet and they stumbled at the shock of the blow. Rey kicked as hard as she could with her other leg, sending them crashing to the floor. Finn heaved her onto the walkway and cradled her in his arms, both of them bloodied and heaving. BB-8 latched onto the ship and catapulted himself inside. The walkway closed shut and Poe ran toward the cockpit. “What’re you doing, Chewie? Get us outta here _now_!” he barked.

“Chewie’s here?” Rey asked weakly.

“Of course,” he soothed. “The Resistance came to rescue you, Rey. You’re safe now.” He pulled her into a tight hug and their bodies shifted together as the Falcon took off into space.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey reunites with the Rebels, and while they're very much the same, she has changed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The long-awaited update! I should be able to wrap this up in two more chapters (and hopefully soon though I won't give a deadline). Give it up to graduating from college and having time and brain space to write fun stuff! Thanks to everyone who commented, it gave me the encouragement to finish this :) 
> 
> P.S. Check out my new Catradora smutty one-off

The next several hours were a blur as Rey drifted in and out of consciousness. She vaguely remembered floating in a bacta tank, a flurry of familiar faces coming and going, Finn pressing a hand to the glass. Her mind awoke before her body. She was lying in a bed with stiff sheets, and the smell of medicine and sanitary products stung her nose. An angry droid chirped in response to a faraway question that was too muddled to understand. _Ben_, she called out in her mind. Her hand groped to find him and she felt a pulse in the Force. Two warm hands wrapped around hers. “You’re not wearing your gloves,” she murmured in her half-sleep, drawing them to her chest.

The hands withdrew and she opened her eyes. “Finn,” she said, her body tense.

“Surprised to see me?” He smiled, but there was sadness in his eyes.

“I-I can’t believe that you’re really here,” she stammered. “Or more like that I’m really here.” She drew him in and hugged him tightly. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too, Rey.”

The embrace, although much needed, was awkward. She didn’t know how long to hold on and pulled away when she couldn’t bear the uncomfortability anymore. “So,” she said wringing her hands.

“You slept for a long time. I thought you were gonna sleep through the rest of the war,” Finn joked, the light returning to his eyes.

Rey usually admired his ability to smile and move on, but now it created an unfamiliar chasm between them. “How long was I out?”

“A whole day. I was here for most of it. I wanted to be the first person you saw when you woke up.” He paused, becoming suddenly serious. “I can’t imagine what they did to you in there. What…he did to you in there.” He gripped her hands tightly and leaned forward so Rey could feel his breath on her face. “But I’m here for you, Rey, in whatever way you need me.”

Rey’s eyes shifted to the floor. “Finn, I-“

“Rey, is that you?” Poe called from down the hall.

She was awash with relief when he bounded into the room followed closely by an ecstatic BB-8. “You’re finally awake!” he said, ignoring the moment he had clearly interrupted, and squeezed her until she grimaced.

“Ease up, will you?” Finn said protectively, eliciting an eye roll from Rey.

“It’s fine,” she assured Poe, but he gently let her go.

“I’m sorry, I just didn’t think we would find you there. You weren’t listed on the detention records, so we assumed you’d been transferred. Leia was all ‘Trust the Force’ but that’s not really my thing. But here you are!” He hit her arm playfully, ignoring a reproachful look from Finn.

BB-8 pushed Poe aside and whirred happily.

“Aw, I missed you too,” she said, patting him on the head. “If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t have made it out of there. So thank you. You’re a real hero.”

BB-8 spun around the room excitedly.

“Alright, alright,” Poe admonished him. “Save some glory for the rest of us.”

“You guys haven’t changed at all,” Rey said warmly. “I can’t tell you how much I’ve missed you.”

“Us too,” Finn said, still holding her hand.

“Where’s Chewy?” Rey asked.

“He’s manning the controls,” Poe responded. “He still doesn’t trust me with this hunk of junk,” he added dejectedly.

“I don’t blame him,” she teased.

“I would’ve gotten us there in half the time!”

“And half the number of pieces,” Finn remarked.

“Where are we going, anyway?” Rey asked.

“To meet up with the rest of the Rebel fleet. We’re hiding out on a small planet in the Ottega System. We should be there soon, but they’re gonna want to debrief you as soon as possible,” Poe said. “Especially on your escape, that’s gotta be a wild one. I can bring up a connection whenever you’re ready.”

Her face paled and she swallowed hard. “Debrief, yes. Can’t wait,” she said weakly. Poe gave her a puzzled glance but dropped it when she gave him a look. She needed time to get her story straight before she talked to anyone about her time in captivity.

“I’ll tell them you still need some time to recover,” Poe said knowingly.

“What are we doing in the Ottega System?" Rey asked, changing the subject. "That seems a little too populated to be a Rebel base.”

“We staged a decoy insurgence on Ithor to draw the Sith Lord away from his main ship so we could rescue you,” Finn explained.

“Not that we couldn’t have done it without his highness on the ship,” Poe smirked.

BB-8 impersonated him, swaying dramatically from side to side and rolled out of the room before Poe could retaliate.

“You get back here!” Poe yelled, running after him.

Finn and Rey made eye contact. “Dramatic,” they said at the same time and burst into laughter.

“Oh, god, I forgot was it felt like to laugh like this,” Rey breathed, wiping a tear from her eye.

“I’m sure it must have been awful,” Finn said staring at the ground. “I’m sorry we couldn’t get there sooner.”

“I know you tried your best.” She placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “And I didn’t lose hope.” She wasn’t sure that was entirely true, or that she had rather found hope in something new. Someone new. She sensed a change in the atmosphere now that they were alone again and got out of bed before Finn had a chance to speak.

“Man, I could stretch my legs,” she said through a yawn. In reality, she wanted nothing more than to stay in bed, but she couldn’t stand feeling confined by the enthusiasm upon her return. She knew in her heart that if they had known what she did there, they would have abandoned her. She didn’t betray their secrets, but she may as well have. And it felt wrong to celebrate that.

A disappointed Finn followed her out with a hand at the small of her back. The gesture was sweet, but it sent waves of guilt coursing through her. She slid out of his reach, failing to be inconspicuous. _You’ll have to tell him eventually_, she thought to herself. But for now, she would avoid the truth at all costs.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo Ren must cope with the news of Rey's escape. Smut ahead! No content warnings.

“What do you mean she _escaped_,” Kylo hissed at the person on the other line.

“W-well, Supreme Leader, s-sir,” they stuttered. “It was the rebels. They attacked the ship and she managed to escape.”

“Where the fuck were the guards?” he yelled.

“They were d-dispatched when the attack began.”

His breath quickened. “And whose idea was it to leave a Jedi unguarded when the fucking Resistance was there to rescue her?”

“It… It was m-m-me, my lord.” Their voice was a whisper. “I thought her chambers were secure.”

He paused. “You will be the first person I kill upon my return.” Kylo abruptly switched off the comm and slammed his fist on the console, blinking back stinging tears. It felt like he was breathing in thousands of tiny needles into his chest. He couldn’t get enough air.

“She left me.”

His voice was hollow, unfamiliar. Distant. His gloves squeaked under the pressure of his hands clinging to the steering mount. On the periphery of his mindscape, he saw an angry Leia packing away Han’s things once again.

“She didn’t say goodbye.”

_Through the kitchen window, he saw an empty space where the Falcon should have been, impressions from its weight still in the grass. _

“Fuck!” he yelled, gasping for air. He shook his head and returned to the present. He needed to get out of the ship, to move, to destroy. In a panic, he grabbed the bottle of liquor Eyal had given him and downed several large gulps. Liquid ran down his chin and his throat burned. He took one more desperate drink and stumbled his way down the ramp onto the planet’s surface.

The city still smoldered around him, churning with the smoke of burned buildings and singed flesh. Even through his helmet, the stench seared his nostrils. A wave of nausea rolled over him and he wretched into his helmet before he could remove it. He threw it to the ground and spat in disgust, wiping the vomit from his face with the back of his sleeve.

“Rey,” he whispered, falling to his knees.

He reached out to her through the Force bond in desperation. “Finn,” he heard as a scene materialized before him. Though he couldn’t see the man, he recognized the name as that of the turncoat. She was holding his hands. “I can’t believe that you’re really here.”

He severed the connection and gazed at the destruction around him. “I’m a monster,” he said flatly. “She could never…” He threw a fistful of rubble into the coming night and ignited his saber, rising from the ground. In a haze of red, he attacked whatever was left in one piece, including the bodies of the fallen. Yet the chaos within him remained. For the first time in his recent memory, violence could not quell the unrest within him. His body hummed, unsettled by anxious energy.

Swaying with his saber to the ground, he could recall faint memories of peace and tranquility, memories that Snoke had demanded he purge forever. And though he locked them away, so far away that even Snoke could not detect him, he could never bring himself to entirely forget. He dropped his saber and fell to his knees once more.

_“Just sit and breathe Ben,” Luke had counseled him. Han had left him with his uncle when the role of father was too dull, and Leia was off working on a restoration effort. _

Kylo closed his eyes and did as he was told, imagining a gentle river floating by.

_“You must learn to control your feelings if you want to be a Jedi,” Luke cautioned. _

_“Or I’ll turn to the dark side,” a young Kylo responded._

_“Yes. Or you’ll turn to the dark side.”_

Kylo tried to imagine the peaceful river, but the image was unfocused. Instead, all he could see were the penetrating blue eyes of his uncle. “I’m too far gone,” he said, his voice breaking. “Nothing can save me.”

\--

He made his way to the Order’s planet-side camp outside of the city, though the stench of death was still heavy in the air. His ship landed with a thud. Even with the Force, flying under the influence was difficult. He took a moment to steady himself; he couldn’t afford to show any weakness now that Rey had escaped. He strode off the ship with purpose, his helmet at his side. _I am Kylo Ren_, he thought. _I am terror. _

A group of passing stormtroopers stopped dead in their tracks. He could envision their stunned expressions at the sight of his face. He threw his helmet at one of them. “Clean this,” he commanded through gritted teeth, straightening his posture. People continued to stare at him as he passed, curiosity winning over fear. He wished that he looked the monster that he was. Vader, Sidious, Snoke, and countless thousands before them. The dark side had scarred them to perfection, yet he bore a single scar at the hand of an untrained girl. 

He wanted nothing more than to be alone, but he was needed at the officer’s tent to discuss the next course of action. Their attack was in direct response to insurgent activity. By the time they confirmed they were empty threats, the city was already in ruins. However, the planet’s mineral deposits made it an asset to the Order. While they preferred a forceful takeover, Eyal had convinced them to try a diplomatic means to save face with the public. And before they could move forward, he needed to confirm them.

He pushed his way through the guards posted outside of the officer’s tent.

“Supreme Leader,” Hux said. He eyed Kylo with amusement. “You’ve arrived just in time. Ms. Eyal’bibe was just going to discuss her new strategy.”

The generals were much more restrained than the soldiers and kept their gaze focused on the schematics in front of them. _Good_, he thought. _They should fear me._

He sat in the only open seat at the table across from Eyal’bibe. She smiled politely, but her eyes smoldered. He couldn’t help but think she had somehow arranged him to sit across from her.

The details of the meeting were hazy. He remembered sound bites, some belonging to him, but everything was a blur until he found himself staring at the ceiling of his tent. He couldn’t recall leaving the meeting or getting into bed. Or getting undressed, he realized, when he looked down at himself in his boxers.

“Supreme Leader,” a guard called from outside of the tent. “Eyal’bibe is here to see you.”

He let out a heavy sigh. He just wanted to be alone. “Give me a minute,” he said curtly.

“My lord,” Eyal said as she entered the room.

“What the fuck, Eyal?”

She smirked at his modesty. “Do not mind me,” she said, halfheartedly guarding her eyes with her hand.

“I’ve killed men for less.”

“Yes, but have you ever killed a woman for catching you unrobed?” she teased playfully.

He grunted and moved to the edge of the bed.

“You do not look well.” Eyal moved gracefully into the center of the tent.

“You are testing my patience. Why did you come here?”

“What I mean to say, my lord, is you look like you could use a drink.”

His stomach churned at the thought of consuming more liquor, but his mind lit up. “Alright.” He wasn’t in the mood for casual conversation.

“May I?” she asked, gesturing toward a chair in the corner.

Kylo nodded, but he didn’t look at her, staring ahead at a fleck of dirt on the wall.

She pulled the chair closer to the bed, so close that their knees were almost touching.

“If you reach into that compartment there, you will find a bottle.”

He looked at her quizzically. “How did you know?”

“I prepared your room,” she smiled knowingly.

“I don’t have any glasses.”

“I do not mind sharing saliva with a human if you do not mind sharing saliva with a twi’lek.” Her eyes dared him to say no.

He took a drink and passed her the bottle. “Now tell me why you’re here.”

She took a drink before responding. “Mmm, my favorite,” she said with a wink. “To be frank, with the girl gone we will need to issue a statement. You cannot appear weak.”

He resumed staring at the spot on the wall ahead of him.

Eyal pressed further, carefully gauging his temperament. “What she did is unforgivable, my lord. The world must know that your mission will not suffer at her loss.”

“And what if it will?” He registered surprise on her face, the careful façade broken for only a moment.

“The Kylo Ren I know would not allow that to happen.”

It was hazardous for her to address him by name. She was playing a dangerous game, and he was intrigued. For the first time, he noticed her neckline, his eyes tracing the ample line of cleavage down her chest, a movement he was certain she noticed. Their fingertips brushed when he took the bottle from her hands. He took another drink.

“Nor would he allow himself to become so entangled.”

He grimaced. Her words were true. He was no longer the same man, but he wanted to be. “I will never love again.”

“Love makes us weak,” she responded. “And it provides our enemies with a means to hurt us. If you do not love, you cannot be hurt.” She brushed her knee against his as she leaned forward.

“It helped with the pain. The pain of existing.” He stared at her with a blank expression.

“I know one thing that can help ease the pain. And it is much more fun than love.” His unwavering stare was unsettling. She slid her hand further up his leg, watching for a sudden glint of rage that never came. Her hand rested at his hip, their lips inches apart. In a flurry of movement, their lips met and Kylo pulled her onto his lap. She straddled him, pulling her skirt around her hips to reveal her bare cunt, hips gyrating against his cock.

Kylo grunted, pulling away from their kiss to take another drink from the bottle.

She snatched the bottle from his hands and poured some down her chest. Kylo gripped her shoulders tightly and pulled her closer, running his tongue from the inside her cleavage to her throat. He moved the straps off her shoulders and removed her breasts from the dress, her purple nipples hard. He massaged them with his hand, using his other to stroke her lekku.

Eyal gripped his cock and guided it to her cunt, her lips a deep purple and dripping with her slick. She rubbed his cock along her cunt a few times to lubricate it and then slowly lowered herself onto it. “Mmmmm,” she hummed, lifting her hips with increasing speed.

Kylo grunted and guided her hips, leaving red marks that would surely bruise later. The pain seemed to excite her, though neither one was concerned with the other’s pleasure, only in satisfying a carnal urge in the heat of passion.

“Ngh,” Kylo groaned, close to cumming as he watched her blue tits bounce before him.

Eyal quickly shifted strategy, shaking off his hands and grinding into his cock so each motion sent fire through her clit. She raised her arms and drew one of her lekku into her mouth, sucking the tip. She was close to her climax and ground deeper into his hips.

“Fuck, Eyal,” Kylo grunted. “Can I cum inside?”

Eyal ignored him as her cunt exploded with intensity. “Mmmmm, fuck,” she moaned. “Wait ‘til I am done,” she said before kissing him.

When her movements slowed, Kylo thrust underneath her, holding her body in place. He was seconds away from release when he pushed her to the side and came into his hand. Immediately, he felt a cavernous hole tear open inside of his chest.

“Leave,” he bit out.

Eyal bowed slightly and adjusted her dress, smiling to herself as she left. _That was too easy_.


	20. Update 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the chapter tease, just wanted to post an update!

Hello all and happy Spooptober! I'm happy to report that this fic is almost done! The next chapter (which will replace this as chapter 20) is done, chapter 21 is almost done, and chapters 22 and 23 are in process. While I have some chapters finished, I don't want to upload them until I'm done with everything so I can make sure the ending is done perfectly. I wish I would have done this for the whole story, but I'm proud we've made it this far! I'm not sure when they will be finished. I started grad school in the fall and sometimes my brain needs breaks, so it will probably be another month or two before I upload the finished product. 

In the meantime, I'm posting some fluffy Reylo one-offs for Halloween. They'll be up within the next few weeks, so be sure to check back!

You can find me on twitter @feministfanfic for updates :)


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